Your partner doesn’t feel like attending an event you’ve been invited to, but in the end they agree to join you, however, they wasted so much time that when they decided to leave, the party was almost over. behaviors that people with passive-aggressive disorders may have.
Also known as silent aggression or negative personality disorder, it is much more common than is thought, however, it is very difficult to detect because these people are often elusive and go unnoticed.
- The key to their behavior is the resistance they offer to external demands.
- That is.
- They take a very passive attitude to the essential and reasonable obligations that everyone must assume in their daily lives.
It is very difficult to understand them because they are trying at all costs to evade responsibility. Did they just forget about them, or put them at the bottom of the priority list. For example, if they have promised to bring bread for lunch, they will buy it when guests are already seated and ready to start eating. He’s a major disinterest.
These patients are often demanding, dependent, afraid of loneliness and little self-confidence, they are people with double personality, who live between two extremes, which generates a lot of confusion around them, are manipulative, pessimistic and resentful. Besides, they don’t conceive of self-criticism and don’t feel guilty about everything they do, they try to justify all their actions, or they’re looking for an excuse to do without it, no matter how ridiculous.
People with passive-aggressive disorder usually show a total disagreement between what they say and what they do, it is almost impossible to know how they feel, because they generally do not act totally differently or in two ways.
Is it, for example, like your partner tells you at the same time?Have I stopped feeling love for you and shouting one right away?I can’t live without you!? They maintain ambiguous communication at all times, more indirect than direct.
The most normal thing is that if someone bothers you about a behavior you’ve had, talk about it and try to fix it. It’s not like that. They remain silent and act outwardly as if nothing had happened, yet their inner being is full of anger.
Therefore, they live complacent, but full of anger, and that anger is never expressed, because they believe that it is a totally unacceptable feeling, that is why they repress themselves and are unable to express it in a healthy way.
In fact, they camouflage the the most well that, even if they are angry, normally no one around them realizes that he is offended or upset, they seem kind, close, docile and pleasant, but deep down they are envious, vindictive and angry.
Passive-aggressive disorder transforms a person into an unsociable, suspicious and lonely person, his personality becomes indomitable and capricious, irritable and irascible.
These are subjects who feel continually treated unfairly, so they tend to act in a hostile or cynical way, your projection goes to the extreme and whatever reasonable explanation you give them, they will always believe that they are the victims, they are also disrespectful and, to defend their independence, generally reject the suggestions that can be made by those around them.
It is very important to them that the people around them do not understand what they want, they are pure appearance. Even if they make you believe that they support you and accompany you, their actions prove otherwise, they will never give you what you ask.
That’s why they don’t believe in deadlines, if you give them a deadline to deliver or do something, as a rule, they won’t comply, they prefer to do things their way and without feeling pressured or engaged.
This greatly affects your performance at work. If your boss asks you for a report by tomorrow, not only won’t he be ready, but he won’t justify his delay or try to explain why he didn’t, you’ll let time pass until you want to, in some cases, these people even tell a made-up story or manipulate certain information to get out of the situation.
Although not known for certain, many experts consider its origin to be a mixture of biological and environmental factors, so self-esteem, attachment to childhood, family dynamics or acquired behaviors would influence the formation of that personality.
Child abuse, excessive punishment, or substance abuse during adolescence can also promote its development. Other conditions that seem to behave like passive-aggressive disorders include attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), stress, depression, bipolar disorder, various personality disorders, or addictions.
We have already seen that it is not easy to respond or confront their behaviors, because the feeling they awaken in the people around them is that of helplessness. If you need to be in close contact with certain “passive-aggressive” people, it is best not to be annihilated by their bad mood and respond with kindness. Being positive, optimistic, funny or talking about trivial issues is the best way to resist the negative influence of your behavior.
If we have enough influence to do so, the person is advised to seek psychological help. The psychotherapist will try to reduce his anger and frustration by teaching him effective coping strategies. The specialist will work on your objectivity, confidence and problem solving in an efficient and healthy way.