The psychological space is a waiting room, a mental palace that one can turn to to reflect, take care of onesecond and take on new perspectives, that is the turning point that we all have to go through after experiencing failure, disappointment, error.
Therefore, giving us a proper introspection time is more than enough to lay the foundations for resilience and then move forward more safely.
- Carl Jung once said that those who learn nothing from unpleasant events in his life force cosmic consciousness to reproduce them as many times as necessary for them to learn.
While it is true that at the moment we cannot prove the existence of this “cosmic force”, we know that we are this curious species that stumbles several times with the same stone.
If we do this it is precisely because we do not give ourselves a psychological space, we do not know or allow ourselves the time necessary to process and integrate certain personal experiences.
Life tends to fragment from time to time and we, far from repairing our cracks or trying to glue spare parts, let them pass, and gradually we become increasingly disconnected from these internal needs until suddenly frustration and misfortune weigh a lot.
Abraham Maslow, one of the most important psychologists in the field of personal growth, said that in our day-to-day life, we basically have two options: the first is to live under the guise of fear and defense mechanisms and the second is to opt for growth. . Choosing one path or another is something we have to decide in our psychological space.
Psychological space is not a physical place, it is a mental corner, it is the time we give ourselves to face failures, mistakes or disappointments and understand what we can learn or learn from those experiences.
At the same time, it means being able to shape a number of dimensions that allow our psychological healing room to be extremely effective.
These are the inhabitants who live in a good psychological space
Self-pity is the ability to receive and accept us without punishing or despising us for certain events.
Studies such as that conducted at the University of Tennessee in the United States show that developing this skill is critical to gaining emotional well-being, however, the more stress we feel, the more we forget this positive attitude toward ourselves.
Therefore, every psychological space needs this special nutrient, this space in which we accept ourselves without judging or punishing us.
In any growth-oriented psychological space there is one element that cannot occur: negative dialogue, that dialogue in which our thoughts vary between disapproval, doom, prevention, necessity and fear, acts gradually with the force of a cyclone. Swipe everything wherever you go.
If we want to learn a valid lesson from failure, a negative dialogue will be useless. We need an objective and forward-looking approach.
So, there are some questions that can help us, such as: What conclusions can I draw from the event ?, What should I do to deal with it in the future with better resources and properly?
The laws of physics tell us (for now) that we cannot be in two places at the same time, there is no need to focus on the past or the future of which we know nothing.
If we really want to overcome these complex everyday circumstances, only one approach is valid: the one centered on the present.
Reflect, analyze, accept, decide, plan, design, etc. All of the above will be more valid than putting your eyes on the mirror.
In our psychological space there must be a basic material, a type of alloy with which to cover each fragment, every corner, every detail. We’re talking, of course, about resilience.
This ability to learn from experience and face the future with more integrity, wisdom and strength is a fundamental aspect of any inner healing process, it is also the masterpiece that encourages personal growth and adjusts our lenses so that the vision clearly sees which. it is the best way. to take from now on.
In conclusion, there is one aspect that deserves to be taken into account: Stephen Sideroff, writer, researcher and professor of psychiatry at the University of Los Angeles in the United States, says in one of his articles that we are living what many define. as a biological unfit with which we must learn to work.
This term refers to a specific fact: when we experience stress, anxiety, fear or worry, our body is programmed to generate two types of response: fighting or escaping danger.
As we well know, in today’s world there is not always room for these two behaviors, so we are obliged to generate more appropriate and also more creative responses, it is not worth escaping, turn to face the problem or fight enemies that, as we know, are not even physical in many cases. Most of our threats are mental.
We need to shape more valuable strategies, which go through a specific place: our psychological space, that open access mental corner that is often overlooked, a space in which we find refuge whenever we need to integrate experiences, heal, repair and make important decisions.