A change for the better is also a challenge, an adventure that, in most cases, we undertake it partially or totally blindly, moving forces us to face the uncertainty of what will happen and to abandon the security mechanism to which we were accustomed.
Choosing a little-known path we haven’t taken yet is an exercise in bravery and often intelligence, it’s hard to move to an inhospit place, even when this new form is supposed to be much better than the old one, whether it’s accepting a job with greater responsibility, including an exercise routine in our daily lives, or starting a romantic relationship.
- While this is a change for the better.
- It is a process and.
- As such.
- We have to go through a series of steps with their respective emotional states and their consequences.
- We must also consider that our brain prefers permanence.
- Stability.
- And a sense of security of what is already known; so.
- On some occasions.
- He deceives us by creating doubts and using nostalgia to stop us.
Therefore, there are changes that, while leading us to what we so desire, also hurt. One way or another, to change is to say goodbye to what until now was part of our lives, whether habits, people or situations. What can we do to control this sense of loss?
“When the wind of change blows, some build walls, others build windmills?. Chinese proverb?
Starting a new stage is to leave another one behind and, in order for everything to go well, it is best to finish the last one, that is, let us not leave any questions unanswered, for this we have to say goodbye, but it is not always easy, because it requires a lot of courage and a clear understanding of what you want for you, however, it is still very complex.
Farewell to what we’ve been doing or feeling so far includes assuming and controlling how we feel about it, for example, if we decide to go divorce because we think it’s best for us and so we’ll be fine, we have to control the sadness we feel by the end of the relationship with the other person. Although this is a change for the better, this ending also causes pain.
If we do not control our feelings well, they can slow down our transformation process; that is, to prevent change when the stage in which we are late, can be out of fear, indecision or perhaps out of fear of what others may think of us, the fact is that by not controlling our emotional state well we are therefore important to take into account that pain, sadness and even irritation may be associated with a change for the better.
To help us move forward, we may wonder what motivates us to continue like this, what we expect in taking this step, what we don’t want to miss, the answers to these questions will clarify the path and emotional confusion we feel. We’ll remember why we decided to change.
Once doubts are dispelled, only pain remains to be accepted; that is to say go through the discomfort of leaving the caterpillar stage and starting to become a butterfly. In addition, we will remember that a change is always an exchange of losses and gains between our “I”. of the past and our future, through a path: the “I” of the present. That’s why it’s important to identify what we say goodbye to and the opportunities we seek during this change.
“Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to live in. “Soren Kierkegaard?
Goodbye is not the end point of the process of change, not even the last paragraph of the chapter, after the previous stage, remains to be opened the new reality, generated by the attitude initiated and the current repertoire of driving. uncertainties that will require, in addition to the expected change, a process of adaptation to the consequences.
Change pushes us into a universe of possibilities, where our attitude functions as a compass, so the attitude with which we deal with all this depends on us, mastering our emotional side is also necessary at this new stage: this is where we must remain calm. , remember the moments when we got lost, but understand that, in the end, we find ourselves.
There will be aspects of the new situation that will seem pleasant, others that may be unknown and even some that are not very pleasant. At the end of the day, the will and responsibility to stay is entirely ours. The key is not to get lost in this new path.
As we see, changes to improve can be painful as they involve saying goodbye to a part of our history. Resignation is the price to pay when we want and we have to start a new stage.
“I learned that you can’t go back, that the essence of life is to move forward. Is life really a one-way street?. ?Agatha Christie?