Surely you know at least one couple who have separated and returned more than once. They try, but in the end these second chances given to them don’t seem to work. At this point the second chances become third, fourth, fifth, until they end up trying. Maybe trying again isn’t an option for them.
Second chances are not an alternative that can work for all couples, because they often have many grudges, unresolved problems and other circumstances that, no matter how much effort we make, we will not be able to overcome.
- Giving another chance often works very well and even improves the relationship.
- But that’s because the two people in the relationship were able to enjoy the time they spent apart.
- Doesn’t work the same way.
Why don’t the second chances work? For a simple reason: couples return for the wrong reasons, this can range from the need to the emptiness they feel after sharing their life with someone for so many years, all of this can mean they suffer emotional dependence, a problem that affects many people today.
If you return to your partner for the wrong reasons, there’s no way the relationship will continue. He gave himself another chance because he felt alone, because he found himself unable to continue his life after his separation, because he could not tolerate sadness or overcome the rupture.
You miss your partner because you can’t be alone, and that’s a negative thing, the problems that led you in the end will still be present, repeated and encourage you to invest in a toxic relationship in which you will be anything but happy. .
You need your partner because you’re afraid of loneliness, you’re afraid of that sense of emptiness that occurs when you extend your arms over the bed and you don’t touch anyone, when you’re full of bags and there’s no one to help you. use, when no one kisses your lips.
Maybe you made the big mistake of leaving all your happiness in your partner’s hands, and now it’s harder than expected, you’re not able to manage your life alone, to see beyond your relationship, you think that without this person your life has no future and no hope of moving forward. What you don’t know is that it’s possible to be happy alone, you’re more than that, just spend time alone.
If you enjoy your time without your partner, you will be able to discover and see your relationship in another way, from different angles, in this way you can check if it did well, if you deserve a second chance or if the breakup made more sense in the part of both.
Couples who get a second chance and this job have taken advantage of all the time they spend without their partner. They saw it as an opportunity to reflect, to see everything from a different perspective and to think before making the wrong decision.
This type of couple knows that they are companions of life, but that they are also individual beings and that their happiness depends not on each other, but on themselves, so they are not afraid to be alone. They choose to share their life with the other person and not make the other person the food of their lives.
But in many romantic relationships, there is always a belief that half of the orange exists, and that makes us long to be in a relationship. But make no mistake, we must be in a relationship, not in love. These are two very different things that sometimes make us believe that we are in love, when in reality what we want is simply to have someone on our side.
But second chances also depend on the previous problems that led to the end of the relationship, let’s say it’s infidelity. If the person can’t overcome this terrible betrayal, trying again is a waste of time, you would unconsciously blame your partner for certain things, you wouldn’t trust him and doubt everything, that wouldn’t be good for either of us either. .
So, before you give it another chance, it’s important that you solve your problems, not only the couple’s, but also the individual ones, in this way you can relaunch the relationship, without grudges and knowing that you are independent. beings and that you are not together because you do not know how to be alone, only in this way will the second chances be achieved.