The benefits generated by this condition are called secondary anxiety gains How does anxiety generate benefits?Oddly enough, it’s true, if we leave room inside for an unpleasant situation and keep it, it’s because it brings us something, incredibly, but it brings us. If this were not true, it would be easier to try to find a way to get rid of this torment.
Just because there are secondary gains in anxiety doesn’t mean that these gains are positive if we take stock of all the consequences, it just means that sometimes people choose unhealthy ways to adapt to reality, in general, we’re not always aware of that. . However, we have been able to sit down and, one way or another, take advantage of this situation.
- Perhaps this can be better understood by an example: suppose a person is homeless.
- So he decides to make a makeshift tent in a lonely field.
- If he stays there.
- Maybe he’s looking for ways to incorporate some comfort into his place of residence.
Maybe you can get cardboard to better protect yourself from the cold, and you can even start furnishing the place, plus in this new place she occupies doesn’t have to pay taxes or rent. The basic problem of having a home real. no been solved, but the person is taking advantage of the situation as much as they can. The same goes for secondary anxiety gains.
“We are what we do over and over again. So excellence is not an act, but a habit?. – Aristotle-
Of course anxiety is a condition that causes suffering, the reasonable thing to do then would be to find a way to overcome it, but human beings are not just a reason. There are a number of unconscious and irrational factors that make us insist even when we feel emotional pain.
The person does not try to feel a constant state of anxiety, but once installed, things that were not planned begin to happen.
For example, it is quite common for the anxious person to receive special attention from those around them, they may consider him nervous or too sensitive, or something, so, inadvertently, the person has the advantage of gaining more attention, and perhaps consideration, from others. This inadvertently reinforces the negative state in which it is located. This is how secondary anxiety works.
Greater attention on the part of others is not the only gain that is achieved, anxiety can also become an excuse not to face the world and form a protective bubble, also explain a multiplicity of behaviors of negligence, abandonment or laziness, in addition, it can also justify rudeness, lack of responsibility and infantilism. “I’m just really anxious and that’s why I can’t do it. “
Anxiety can become a way to get exactly what you want; this state serves as a shield to decide not to face real fears, which every human being must face at one time or another. Fears like being alone, facing rejection, saying no, looking and finding work to support yourself, etc. We all feel anxious about such situations, yet we need to find a way to overcome it.
These examples are not the only means by which secondary anxiety gains are present, as we have already said, the attention of others, the possibility of remaining in a comfort zone that no one questions, the option to justify all our failures, etc. . , they are an excellent justification for not assuming certain responsibilities.
It is important to emphasize that this is not done on purpose. The anxious person feels real pain and makes no conscious plans to take advantage of the situation. All of this happens unconsciously and is also maintained unconsciously as it has certain advantages.
The problem is that the person manages to organize an entire life project around anxiety, refusing to grow and depriving himself of many positive experiences, such as the man who has nowhere to live and ends up living forever in a precarious place.
Thus, the solution is not to accept that anxiety is an inseparable part of ourselves, on the contrary, this state can be overcome. If you don’t do it yourself, it’s important to seek professional help.