According to Professor Marcus Caldas of the University of Deusto in Spain, secrets and denial fuel addictive behaviors in families Why are we talking about dependent families, not drug addicts?In the opinion of this specialist, the addict is a fruit and at the same time. Time affects your environment in one way or another. This environment often participates in addiction, consciously or unconsciously.
Caldas proposes that the family function as a system, in which the action or inaction of each of its parts has an impact on the others; Similarly, in dependent families, the overall structure has a decisive influence on the individuals who make up it.
- Dependent families often use secrecy and denial.
- Two tools to prevent alcohol or drug abuse in one or more of their members.
- This approach is inadequate and it is not uncommon for it to lead to the opposite effect.
- I.
- E.
- Increased dependence.
“The dependent’s family is severely affected throughout the process of developing addiction, as it generates particular conflicts and emotions in each of its members. “Adela Shwatz-
Dependent families are those where there are patterns of behavior and attitudes that promote compulsive dependence. Do your members usually consider? Normal: many behaviors that are not; or that, knowing that there is no “normality”, they decide to ignore this reality and keep the situation as it is. Some features typically occur in dependent families, such as:
Two of the common characteristics of dependent families are the use of secrecy and denial in different areas of life, it is very common, for example, that if the parent is dependent he becomes taboo, it should not be discussed with anyone and should not be discussed with anyone. to be discussed It’s just, and that’s it.
It is also common for family members to have their own secret behaviors, such as hiding bottles, having clandestine relationships, or developing behaviors that no one in the family has any idea about. Similarly, the secret desires associated with the destruction of the family, They incubate the initial exit or cover-up of behaviors of sexual abuse.
Secrets become so secret reserved that they eventually become denials. It’s like lying to yourself and ending up believing that lying is the truth. Simulated behavior becomes commonplace and behaviors that are not “normal” are “normalized”.
All of this together creates a more or less constant sense of chaos in emotions, thoughts and behaviors, silences the important, and at the same time exposes itself to the irrelevant, despair and despair often become an excessive desire for control. becomes a source of shame and concealment.
It is normal for secrecy and denial to occur around the most openly dependent person, who releases a logic with which he expresses the idea that he is not doing what he is actually doing, or that the consequences of what he is doing are not of great importance Different logics are excluded. If there are children involved, their emotional world “disappears. “
Addictions are complex phenomena that are not limited to the use of a substance or the compulsive repetition of conduct, the most important thing in dependent families are not these manifestations, but the lifestyle and behaviors that encourage, from the point of view of secrecy and denial, are only doomed to deepen their problem more and more.