Have you ever stopped to think about self-deception?We all know, one way or another, lies, some are braver and admit that they are capable of lying, others do not admit this weakness.
Who has never told himself a lie?Maybe you didn’t even realize you were lying?Can we think about that?
“The most common lie is one with which a man is wrong. Is cheating on others a relatively healthy defect?
-Nietzsche-
Deceptions and lies are inherent in life in all its aspects, even nature uses them as a resource. Viruses, for example, are able to trick our immune system into our body, to achieve its survival goal, but what about us?
In addition to lies tainted with some intention of achieving something concrete, there are lies that sustain us for a time or even a lifetime, we invent these lies to escape reality and prefer unconsciousness.
Dostoyevsky wrote in? Memories of the subway ?
“Every human being has memories that he would only tell his best friends. Similarly, we can say that every human being is afraid not to tell even his best friends, but only himself and yet in the greatest secret. But there are things people don’t dare say to themselves. Even the most honest men have many of these thoughts stored somewhere in their minds.
In addition to consciousness, language is very important in self-deception, although reality remains what it is, each builds his own, it is through the language that we transmit and describe our reality, for us reality is a reflection of how we interpret it.
People have a great ability to create beliefs and stories sesarated in all aspects of life. Who can get rid of assumptions and collusions?
We are victims of our own traps to survive in our daily lives
There’s a web of lies that support us, and often it’s the wives who tie us to certain situations without us no counting, so we feel like no matter what we do, we can’t move on.
“Truth has the structure of fiction. “
-Jacques Lacan-
When the force of events becomes threatening, sometimes fear of suffering makes us try to escape reality, blocking our attention and deceiting us. Therefore, we fill the empty spaces with imaginary or fanciful explanations, automatically. eyes don’t see, the heart doesn’t feel. “
That way, if I don’t see it, if I don’t understand what’s going on, the danger and anxiety subside and I can move on. The facts were ignored and changed the meaning of the experience. The lie is present, without us nodding, hidden behind silences, justifications, denials and sand castles.
Lies feed on the power of our selective attention to hide and alter painful truths, creating a reality more acceptable to us.
A costume that reminds us of the fake? Winnicott, where lying is considered part of the natural development of human identity, from childhood, which alleviates the anguish and suffering caused by the expectations that parents place on their children; they deny themselves and build a character according to the ideal their parents created.
Self-deception can be generated to meet our own expectations or those of others; or to justify that we don’t want to see reality as it is.
This can happen in relationships when, for example, we do not realize that the situation is unsustainable and that our feelings have changed. It can also occur, in case of chemical dependence, when the person believes that they can control their consumption; social and political relations?
Self-deception is an important defense against threats of danger, presented as armor that protects us from difficult-to-assimilate experiences, a character armor like Willhelm Reich said. A shield behind which he? I? He is hidden, used to protect himself from the anguish of living in a world considered hostile.
Therefore, the better we are wrong, the better we will deceive others. The best way to hide a deep disappointment is to not be aware of it.
Self-deception can have many aspects and sometimes a very high cost, in these cases the world of the person is fragmented and the ignored information is left in his unconscious, hidden by the lie of conscience.
So, as Daniel Goleman says in his book “The Blind Spot,” the first step in waking up from self-deception is to realize how we “sleep. “That is, first of all, consider the possibility that we may be wrong in certain respects. of our lives, and then enter this web that we have built ourselves to escape reality.
A lot of times we don’t realize what we don’t like, and we don’t realize that we don’t notice anything, too?Most of us have unknowingly made a pact with this old Arabic proverb:
“Don’t wake the slave because he can dream he’s free. “But the sage will say, “Wake up the slave! Especially if you dream of freedom. If you wake up and realize you’re still a slave. “, maybe you can free yourself?.