How much do you love each other? Think, you may never have asked this question or even thought about it. No problem. It’s more normal than you think, we have a bad habit of forgetting ourselves. It’s as if we don’t exist, as if we were invisible to us, as if taking care of ourselves is off our list of priorities, in fact I dare say that self-esteem does not occupy a place on this list.
How do you ever stop to think about it?The way we talk, the way we think about who we are, and ultimately how we value ourselves influences how we feel. The problem is, we don’t think about it much.
- We are used to living on our toes.
- Upstairs.
- Without going too far into how what is happening around us affects us.
- It is as if we do not value our personal well-being.
- The case is that over time.
- The weight of the day increases and.
- If we do not take care of ourselves.
- We could find ourselves wrapped in a gray fog that gradually haunts us.
Living disconnected from within has its consequences, even if we are not aware of it, we can see it in the protagonist of the short film that is at the end of this article, but what can we do to free ourselves from the trap of automation?How can we prevent negative tags and messages we receive from continuing to grow in us?Let’s go a little further.
Since we were little, we’ve grown up getting all kinds of messages about who we are, how should we feel, and how should we act, parents, teachers, friends, life partners?Does everyone have anything to say to us, most of the time with good intentions?although it’s not always positive or appropriate for us.
since? It’s impossible to put your feet on the ground, are you wasting your time, focus on what’s important, until you get there?Or, just, “you dream too much. ” The fact is that all the messages we receive affect us in one way or another, especially during our childhood, in fact some of them shape our identity, others function as commandments that we must follow, and when we do not, we feel guilty.
In some cases, this acquired guilt results in the emotional wound of rejection, a very deep and painful mark that results in a deep sense of self-contempt, which results in an underestimation of oneself and a void in self-love. with this injury is a very painful reality.
“It took me a long time to learn not to judge myself through the eyes of others. “Sally Field.
Feeling rejected by others and finally by yourself creates a mental trap created by the inner critic, it is this voice that comes from within us and is dedicated to judging how we think, feel and act, for this use any strategy: comparisons, destructive criticisms or various disqualifications.
“Shouldn’t I have said that?” Should I have acted differently?Nothing works for me?these are just a few examples of dialogue led by our internal critique. The problem is, we don’t question it, on the contrary. This kind of message is so ingrained that we give it the absolute value of truth, and in fact everything we do seems to confirm it.
Because if we don’t consider ourselves valid for a position, to lead a team, or even to write, we probably won’t even try, or boycott, to extinguish any hope we can nurture in our minds.
Social media is one of the problems that greatly increase comparisons and negative self-criticism today, because they create alternative realities that can leave us trapped if we are not aware. Spending hours and hours immersed in this scenario of simulated appearances and feelings can lead us to believe that this is all that exists, the truth is that it is only a showcase, in which everyone can control the image that they want to transmit to others.
According to psychotherapist Sherrie Campbell, social media can create a false sense of belonging and connection with others within us, which encourages us to give more weight to this imaginary online world.
The fact is that if we degrade and reject ourselves, that is, if we have a negative image of ourselves, social media will increase that perception, in fact, are they a test?False this will confirm how boring our lives are, how unmused we are and how lonely we are.
It’s not easy to keep up with the pace of life others post on social media. A study by the University of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania (USA), indicates that reviewing social media very often produces envy and distorted belief that others have a more original, joyful and interesting life.
As we see, we are specialists in the abuse of ourselves, but above all in comparing our lives with that of others, without realizing their absurdity Why waste time comparing whether people’s conditions, characteristics, perspectives and experiences are different from each other?
The protagonist of the short film Overcomer is an example of how social media can be a double-edged sword, especially if there are past wounds that have not been healed, because the person carrying the weight of an injury usually filter reality through it.
Your mind often operates with cognitive distortions (wrong forms or interpretations of information processing), such as selective abstraction, personalization, labeling or emotional reasoning, and social media encourages this type of mechanism.
“In the past you were what you had. Now, are you what you share?. – Godfried Bogaard-
What can be done to stop this internal critique?How do we rebuild our broken parts?It seems that the protagonist of our short film finally discovers the secret ingredient: self-love.
“You’re as amazing as you can be. ” – Elizabeth Alraune-
However, it is not easy to reconcile with yourself, much less when the deal was negative most of the time, it has been many years of training in criticism, demand and disqualification so that suddenly, as if by magic, we love each other. requires a lot of patience, effort, acceptance and, of course, commitment to yourself.
Often, embracing our broken parts implies, at first, suffering, but also much courage and the ability to forgive others and forgive themselves. Being able to give us love when that’s what we need most requires a lot of strength and effort. For this reason, there are a number of aspects that we must consider in order to develop self-love:
“Love is a miracle cure. -Louise L. Hay-
As we see, self-love is gradually built, gently weeded and watered every day, it is this light that we all carry in us, but that sometimes it costs us so much to recharge with intensity. which sustains our well-being, the embrace that protects us, and the balm that heals our wounds.
Finally, we left this wonderful short film that further incites reflections on self-love.