Should I call my mother, do I have to tell my boss that I deserve a pay raise, do I need to exercise as my doctor recommended?Should we harass each other every day, becoming trapped prey, surviving on the basis of possibilities that never happen?
This must become a kind of utopia, dissatisfied dreams, unwavering laws and barriers that prevent us from moving forward. Should this definitely be a word that links us to our fears, insecurities and inaction?Therefore, it is necessary to get rid of this burden that we call “should”, which has the power to make any path more tortuous.
- How many times have you said the word? (or should I) in the last days?I guess you couldn’t count them.
- But without fear of making a mistake.
- I’d bet it was said more times than necessary.
- Should this definitely be one of the most common words in our internal dialogues?.
This way of conjugating the verb? Dever? It goes hand in hand with irrational ideas, those beliefs that disturb us and do not let us live satisfactorily. These beliefs are deeply rooted in us and govern our existence. But instead of being a starting point for achieving something bigger, it’s precisely about blocking our tendency to act.
Should they? Or are they?Are they usually accompanied by? Always? Or never. “Nothing is so precise and rigorous. A lot of people use these words to lie to themselves. Do you think that by imposing a conditional task, they will start to mark them as compliments on their agendas, when in fact they are giving strength – with their internal discourse – the possibility of not doing them.
When we say that we must do something in particular, in most cases we cannot do what we want, on the contrary, it all ends up in the context of unfulfilled promises, in an idea said randomly or even unconsciously to convince us that we will change. .
For example, by saying “Should I lose weight because the doctor said my last tests aren’t very good?” you think about the problem. Very well. But not in the solution, could it be that prayer continues with one?Do I have to diet? Or ‘I have to go to the gym. ‘ Both are supposed to be actions that are more likely to be rejected than accepted.
Instead of incorporating so many variables into your future, you could say, “Will I start the diet?Or ‘I’ll sign up for the gym. ‘ Maybe that makes it easier to achieve your goals. However, this is not yet ideal. The best thing to do in this type of situation is to take the first step: take out of our refrigerator everything that is not part of our diet or put on some shoes and start exercising.
The verb? (at any time) refers to an obligation. A concept that can be understood or not, but from which it is impossible to escape. If we are forced to do something we do not understand and learn these higher mandates by heart, it will become increasingly difficult for us to make the decision to put them into practice.
Let us return to the example of the person who comes to the doctor and recommends a series of measures to lose weight, and the patient wonders about its effectiveness, not understanding the logic of what the expert has proposed cannot face the situation. Perhaps if the doctor explained in detail the science behind the relationship between sport and health, would the patient say?Instead of “should,” but I find no reason to do so beyond the imposed duty itself.
The pressures and irrational thoughts that begin with the word?They settle into our minds from an early age. ” Should I get good grades?”I have to obey my parents and my teachers. ” Should I be a graduate?”Do I have to start a family? And a lot of et cetera.
Why should I do all these things?What if we started to understand that getting good grades, respecting the elderly and choosing a good college course or getting married shouldn’t become a burden on the back?
Social norms were established a long time ago, so most people never question them. These rules, which impose us by a moral or cultural rule, were not designed to irritate or harm us, but they are there and often interfere with capacity. to make our own decisions.
What if we don’t comply? What have we been imposed on since our birth?We are afraid, especially when the realization of an ancient premise deprives us of happiness. Shouldn’t we make ourselves feel guilty, did you know that this feeling is only present in people and pets, and in them only because they are absorbed by the human being?
If we do our homework, we’ll be free of weight, but no guilt. The idea that when we overthrow a social command, are we harming society itself?Many times, this is not true. We’re always good people because we don’t have a college degree, we don’t become a threat to the community because we don’t get married.
Keep in mind that some actions will make you happy even if you don’t have the weight of ‘should’. Put your hands at work and move from thought to action. Irrational or continually inherited ideas are the biggest obstacle to living fully. and all because, inadvertently, we continue to nurture your existence.