How long have we been able to manage without looking at notifications from our smartphone?We all had to compete with the possibilities of a technological device and lost.
We certainly already feel how much the person’s attention is diverted in front of us when a new notification appears on the mobile phone and begins to observe the latest events and notifications in a distracted way.
- In fact.
- I’m sure they also interrupted something you were talking about just to answer a call.
- Answer someone on WhatsApp or check social media.
Have we forgotten how to have a conversation?
Clinical psychologist and sociologist Sherry Turkle conducted extensive research reflected in her incredible book “In Defense of Conversation (2017)”. She says in this book that today’s teens have reduced their empathy capacity by 40%, as well as their ability to have a deep conversation Smartphones have a lot to do with it.
New technologies have brought with them a profile whose main objective is to be hyperconnected at all times, but on a superficial level, multitasking has been imposed and many feel that they are wasting their time when they have moments of pause.
“True love is the lack of desire to check your mobile phone in the presence of your loved one. “Alain from Botton.
The digital life in which we are immersed is governed by rules other than those we knew before using the smartphone as an extension of our hands, today much of the social and professional interactions are made through electronic means, such as computers, phones, tablets. Etc.
The face-to-face conversation was left in the background. Some people even see this kind of conversation as a waste of time. If you need to fix a business problem, we send you an email; if we have to apologize to someone, we send a message on WhatsApp.
Facing conflicting situations or a great emotional burden can lead to anxiety, and new technologies offer the possibility of partially reducing this anxiety.
Young people justify using new forms of communication as a simpler and faster way to express their thoughts, saying that mobile devices allow them to rewrite what they mean, correct errors, or avoid tense situations they personally cannot solve.
The problem is that through the screens we lose one of the most rewarding parts of the conversation, nonverbal language, gestures, intonations, looks and emotions of the other person. According to the experts, 70% of the communication is transmitted by non-verbal language That’s a lot!
Today, on most occasions, we replace human reality with “equals” or emojis. It’s very difficult to have conversations full of content and emotion for long periods of time.
As a result, we are part of and form a society that is increasingly struggling to manage its own emotions, face difficulties and solve its responsibilities.
If you don’t share content on the Internet, it’s like you don’t exist; If you don’t share your vacation, you feel like they didn’t exist or you didn’t enjoy them enough. it will be reflected in what it claims to be, but it never really is.
In these circumstances it is more difficult to feel empathy, that is to put yourself in the place of the other and try to understand your emotions and thoughts, we are talking about a digital world purely visual, superficial and constantly evolving.
On the other hand, there is a strong demand for new and constant stimulation, if a student gets very bored in class, smartphones have a lot of power to distract right now, the same goes for a dull moment in a TV series, movie or book.
“You have to develop the ability to be yourself and do nothing. That’s what the phones take away from us. The ability to sit in a seat. Is that exactly what it means to be a person?” – Louis C. K. –
Spaces that were previously presented as an opportunity to start a conversation no longer perform this function. On public transport, almost everyone is looking at something on their smartphone. In supermarkets and stores, people wear hearing aids and browse social media.
People do not talk or talk about what they have seen on social networks, we become machines without sound. We do not pay attention to what is happening around us, we do not talk to strangers and we do not pay attention to what is happening next to us, we jump from one application to another, trying to end the boredom of silence. .
We have millions of contacts available on the Internet that we exchange likes or chat with, but we get bored in a few minutes: “It’s not enough, it’s not what I’m looking for. “
Eternal dissatisfied people who are unable to create authentic relationships, but how can we expect to hear if no one teaches us the value of conversation and empathy?
“We would never have found most of the ideas we have today if we hadn’t had long conversations with people” -Noel Claras
We maintain a frantic pace of life based on hypercon connectivity and multitasking.
At the same time as responding to an email from our boss, we read the last post a friend made on Facebook and check the weather forecast for the weekend. We read a book, but we keep the cell phone close to immediately respond to incoming messages. .
We ask our children not to use their smartphones at the table, but when they call us we respond immediately, we feel anxious to have to be constantly connected to the Internet, but we are also anxious if we spend a lot of time disconnected.
Some companies seem to measure the level of competition based on the availability and functioning of their social media employees, the boss can fire us if we don’t respond to an email at 11 o’am in friendly relationships, which responds immediately seems to be the most valuable.
Does it hurt to see him? Read? And get no response, and we even anxiously check the time the person was last online.
Are we really more efficient in the constant use of new technologies?Are we really best friends to respond quickly, even if the answer is limited to a shallow emoji?We confuse speed and quantity with quality and value.
“If the content is king, the conversation is king. “-John Munsell-
Small moments of solitude are enough to face the sound of hyper-connectivity and listen to one’s own thoughts. We have to give ourselves a space to really talk and listen. We need time to feel without the help of mobile phones.
It is in face-to-face conversations that ties are built and strengthened, we see how the other person feels, we listen to their ideas and concerns, we can feel empathy because we have their joy or suffering before us.
Deep and personal conversations arouse emotions in us, give us a space to open up and vent, to be heard and respected, face-to-face conversations provide an opportunity to generate new ideas, even when we start from seemingly meaningless commentary.
True bonds, personal thoughts, and shared emotions are what keeps us connected in the most authentic way.