Many parents think that their child is the most beautiful, the one with the best grades, the smartest, the one that does everything right. It is natural and, in essence, we are all special and unique. However, constantly showing children what they are doing well, regardless of their mistakes, can lead to narcissistic children growing up.
Wouldn’t much and little?would be an applicable sentence in this case. There are parents who choose to offer their children a negative reinforcement that harms their self-esteem, making them inadequate and incapable; others opt for positive reinforcement, where the negative is ignored. very damaging consequences Let’s see how little narcissists grow.
- A narcissistic child will become a person whose self-esteem will be greatly exaggerated.
- Will impose your needs and wait for others to praise and beat you.
Let’s not say it’s wrong to congratulate the children. Of course, it’s good to point out what they do well: “Did you do this exercise right?”Did you clean the table perfectly?” you’ve been very good?However, we know that children are not perfect, that they make mistakes and that they do evil.
The food of small narcissists is often the constant praise and satisfaction of all their whims on the part of their parents, they can even defend them even if they are not right and blame others, as long as their children are not accountable for what happened.
It is not good for a child to learn not to take responsibility, he will grow up thinking that mistakes are always of others, that others can bear the consequences of his actions and will end up frustrated when he realizes that relationships and the world does not work this way.
Learning to be responsible is critical if we want a child to become a healthy adult.
If a child grows up thinking he’s doing everything right and the others are wrong, he’ll think it’s perfect. Then why fight, why do we do something else? On the contrary, it will continue to demand and denounce the mistakes of others in imposing their tyranny.
Excessive praise, along with a lack of limitations and advice on what’s wrong, can create narcissistic children over time. Many parents may believe that by not reporting their children’s mistakes, they are doing them a favor, but they are actually preventing them from doing so. emotional maturity. Tomorrow, they will have a lot of trouble properly informing people and ingesing themselves.
When parents overestimate their children, they put a veil in front of their eyes that prevents them from criticizing them, if one child pushes another and his father, instead of telling him that he is wrong and that he has to apologize, tell him that the other child deserved it because he probably did something wrong, his ego will inflate, but it is not the worst. In the future, the child will not be able to acknowledge his mistakes or accept that he or she is wrong.
Not constantly congratulating does not mean that we should not emphasize what our children do well and value them, it is possible to develop a healthy self-esteem, the key is balance.
Children should feel accepted by who they are, even if they exhibit certain behaviors that are more acceptable than others. Parents can’t think that if they point out their children’s mistakes, they’ll feel sad and disappointed. From an early age, you must teach them what unconditional love is.
Telling children that they are loved and that irritation or anger does not mean that they do not like you, it is also important to educate them on an equal footing, without commenting on what can be considered in a higher position than others. Not to raise narcissistic children, show that we are all the same, but with different characteristics and qualities.
In addition, it is important to teach them that everything is in place and that everything requires effort, especially when they opt for demanding behaviors and have tantrums.
As we have seen, small narcissists learn to behave selfishly through a series of conditions and attitudes that have a lot to do with the instructions and education they receive from parents, yet it is true that each child’s personal characteristics, such as their personality and other variables, also have a great influence.
However, it is important to remember that children are not perfect, no matter how much parents want to consider them, they also make mistakes and they must learn to accept and be responsible for them, children whose parents show affection and affection have greater self-esteem. . People with high self-esteem feel good about themselves and think they are as good as others; narcissists think they’re better than others.