Controlling means that we can, through our thoughts, emotions and actions, modify certain aspects of the control object in a specific way. If we control something, we have power over it and we can decide its course.
We would all like to be able to control the world around us, but the truth is that there are very few things in which we can have that power, in terms of research this is nothing new and we are aware of it, but emotionally, do we forget very easily ?, something that causes us some discomfort.
- We generally do not tolerate uncertainty and frustration very well when the expectations we have put into something are not met as we would like.
- The truth is that it is quite unpleasant when it happens.
- Just as sometimes it is disturbing not to know what is going to happen in a given situation.
In the outside world, nothing. In you, your whole being, as simple as that. This reality makes us free and peaceful, if we live and believe in it. There’s a pletle of stressful or unhappy problems and circumstances, and it’s normal to be excited when this happens. The emotions that arise from a threat or loss are quite normal and help us to face the problem of our lives.
Healthy emotions, such as sadness, frustration, and pain, help us solve problems because they are not very intense, lasting, or frequent.
When your emotions, on the other hand, become very intense, frequent or lasting, it is because something is missing in your “internal software”. It’s probably because you’re trying to control the uncontrollable. You probably think things had to be different. , exactly as you’d like?. and that way of thinking, in the end, frustrates you, because things aren’t like that just because we want them to be.
As we mentioned, we can control the way we see the world and try to change it, because no one can get into our thinking, yet it is totally absurd to claim that the external, what surrounds us, comes from another world.
Internalize the idea that there’s nothing you can’t control for yourself and you’ll become a flexible and emotionally strong person, able to enjoy what’s in your hands.
To be healthier psychologically, it’s practical to learn how to tolerate uncertainty and frustration. Uncertainty arises when we face something and we don’t know what’s going to happen. Some people react anxiously to uncertainty because they are “preparing” if what is to come is something frightening or dangerous.
In this way, they implement the strategy of ongoing concern. The thing is, as much as we worry about something, in the end it won’t stop what’s going on.
Even if you worry a lot because you’ve noticed that you have a very large headache, it won’t cause you any illness or not, otherwise if you’re finally diagnosed with a disease, you’re responsible and you’re worried, which is totally logical and sensible.
We come across the frustration, that feeling that comes when our expectations are not met. We hope that life, others and even ourselves will have reactions according to certain rules that we invented ourselves, so we were upset, depressed and anxious.
The end result is that the world is on its way and we impose an unpleasant inconvenience. Two problems for the price of one?
Steps you can take to stop controlling and tolerating the feeling of uncertainty around you include: