Silence sometimes serves as punishment. Sorry to stop talking to someone is a way out that many people use: their anger, dissatisfaction, or disapproval. How effective is this method to solve a problem or switch to the other person?What does the decision to avoid words mean when there is resentment within you?
Establishing a dialogue with someone is not easy, especially if there is a conflict that seems to have no solution, but if instead of addressing the issue directly you stop talking to the other person, all you can do is create additional tension. In addition to the unresolved conflict there is a limbo that can become a real poison incubator.
“Tell me to see you. ” -Socrates-
However, many people have no interest in resolving the conflict through dialogue, what they want is for the other to submit to their point of view, so they use silence as punishment for the other to surrender, finally it is a childish attitude and the worst part is that it solves nothing. This only provides a selfish reward.
There are all sorts of arguments to support the idea that s quitting talking to someone is valid, basically what you’re looking for is punishment. Make the person understand that there is disapproval in this absence of words, but why not say it instead of wanting to prove it through silence?Here are the main reasons that defend those who prefer such a measure:
In any case, silence is said to be the best option for resolving the conflict, for some reason the word proved ineffective, so the decision is made to stop talking to someone so that this attitude is understood as punishment and, therefore, that the other reconsiders their attitude.
Silence can have many meanings. Some of them are really violent, to stop talking to someone is to adopt a passive-aggressive attitude, this means that it is violence with the other person, but implicitly, most of the time this type of attitude is also or more harmful than direct aggression. This is true because violence becomes a susceptible vacuum of any kind of interpretation.
For those who stop talking to someone else, there are clear reasons, there is also a clear expectation of what the outcome should be, but anyone using this type of resource should try to answer some questions, such as: Are you sure that the other person really understands the meaning of your silence?Do you really think the best way to make a change or make the person act the way you want is not to talk?
Silence increases distances. And distance is not usually a good ally to understand or restore broken links, on the contrary, it contributes even more to widening the gap.
On the other hand, stun talking to someone can work momentarily, punishment is imposed and the other person reacts: he apologizes again, promises changes or does what you want, but in the long run ends up incubating small resentments that can Silence rarely resolve a conflict or lead to a solution, just hide it.
It’s true that sometimes it’s better not to say anything, when you’re very excited, for example. Anger makes us exaggerate and we care more about hurting the other than really expressing what we think or feel, in these circumstances nothing better than to stop talking while we regain our composure, in such circumstances it ends up being a smart decision.
On the other hand, s quitting to punish or trying to “abandon” the other person, as we have said, rarely works well. Sometimes we face the challenge of expressing our anger or irritation, but without hurting the other. not to stop talking, but to find ways to bridge to understanding, the absence of words can cause the other to give way, which does not mean that the conflict has disappeared, on the other hand, it can also happen that the other person does not act as expected, and what was originally a snowflake becomes an avalanche.
It may be necessary to look for better conditions to speak, it is also a different way of expressing our discontent, changing a daily space for a more welcoming and friendly space sometimes contributes to a renewal of communication, talking with the heart, always referring to the things you feel and not what you think the other feels, is a formula that does not usually fail. Try.