Guilt is a real poison in anyone’s life, it’s basically useless: it haunts us, anguish invades us, and we despise each other.
Guilt can be defined as the perception that we have done, spoken or thought something reprehensible, based on a certain system of values.
- Guilt leads us to reproach ourselves and devalue us; in more severe cases.
- It feeds suicidal thoughts or acts.
Ultimately, it can be said that guilt makes you an enemy of yourself: life becomes hell and the culprit ends up suffering too much.
“As with debts, guilt is no decision other than to pay them. “
-Jacinto Benavente-
In typical guilt what happens is the violation of a rule considered legitimate, for example, those who steal something know that they have violated a social law and a religious law, if the person has religion.
There is guilt that arises from another type of violation of values or norms that are not well defined, for example someone who thinks they have to adapt to a certain model of success, but who cannot.
In this case, a situation that has generally not been established anywhere is accepted as standard or standard, but the vast majority follow it to the letter.
On the other hand, many feelings of guilt are born without doing anything wrong, the person has a thought that is considered reprehensible and that triggers guilt.
An example of this is when the person is irritated with his mother, has aggressive thoughts and wishes never to see her again, then, when you calm down, you feel guilty and tormented by these ideas.
However, the most complex type of guilt is one that occurs unconsciously, there are feelings or thoughts that we feel without being fully aware of them, for example, an unconventional sexual desire or a secret desire to have what others have.
In such cases, guilt is not visible, but it continues to act as a hidden force. The person feels sad, anxious and these feelings seem to have no reason to be.
Unconscious guilt is expressed in the search for punishment: we always do something wrong to be punished, we are late for all appointments to fail us, we forget to do an important job to censor ourselves.
Guilt is something that every person must objectively analyze, the first thing is not to assume that the system of rules established by society is indisputably valid.
There are many cases in human history where something is considered normal and legal, it is completely contrary to human values. The most extreme case was Nazism, which raised the issue of “racial purity” as an absolute truth.
Value systems and standards are not there for us to passively submit to them. As much as they were created by someone with authority, isn’t it healthy to follow them to the letter?If we don’t understand its meaning or if we don’t do it clearly. understand their raison d’eer.
Intent is another determining factor in assessing guilt. Often, wonderful actions are carried out with a deplorable intention. On the other hand, rules are often violated for good reasons.
A politician can give a poor family a home during his campaign. Apparently, it’s an act that deserves applause, but we all know it’s a matter of publicity and has nothing to do with your sense of poverty.
Instead, someone may disobey a rule they consider unfair. In Colombia, Métis country, there has recently been a great deal of controversy over the refusal of an Afro-descendant citizen to be approached by the police.
Unconscious guilt requires more work; consciously, the person does not feel guilty, but usually ends up “paying the duck. ” Without deserving it or feeling constant anguish.
In any case, we clearly see that guilt is a completely unnecessary feeling; it only serves self-harm and sadness.
Guilt is released when we take responsibility for the damage caused, if we have actually done anything, and we repair that damage as much as possible.
When the damage is only imaginary, we have a responsibility to make these feelings aware, to establish their origin and how they manifest themselves.
Living in guilt does not make you a better person, taking responsibility for real or imaginary harm is the real way to overcome this useless facet of suffering.