Raising a child involves quite complex problems. Many parents aspire to keep their children happy; in the pursuit of this desire, they often encounter a paradox: the harder they strive, the less they reach the goal. suffer more for what they don’t have.
They say the new generations were “born tired. ” Many children today seem to have no idea what it means to wake up. The alarm may go off a thousand times and they’re always there, as if nothing had happened. Parents have to call, several times to get up and go to school.
“A lazy person is like a clock without needles, being useless both to walk and to stand. “William Cowper?
A lot of parents know this isn’t right. However, they continue to do so, trapped in the same dynamics they’ve created, they may not want to take care of their child because they don’t feel empowered to do so, or they carry a certain guilt that doesn’t belong to them and they try. to compensate by being more permissive.
The truth is that many children today have become really lazy, do not make their beds and do not know what to do to make clothes look clean and ironed, sometimes they are not so small. Sometimes they reach a very advanced age and behave in the same way. What’s going on?
This desire that the child does not go through certain difficulties has become very recurrent in some parents, it seems that stress and difficult phases are the worst demon that your children can face, so it is necessary to take them out, idealize life and express it in terms similar to a paradise. This is what they want for their children, a colorful paradise where they can grow up without problems.
So they’re building some kind of? Resort? With “all inclusive”. Full board, without even having to worry about “your business”, let alone the rest. Hot dishes, which should be delicious, otherwise run the risk that the child does not want to eat and what is it?Getting sick. Soft bed and always made.
And it doesn’t stop there. They also teach the child to combine the verb ask in all modes and all epochs. Here’s what the child knows best: asking. That’s all you have to do to get what you want. “How can you not offer him the best smartphone if he later feels complex with his peers?”How can we not buy the best clothes? I don’t want you to say you’re walking like a poor man.
Oh, I don’t want my son to go through what I went through, it’s a thought that has often led him, and will continue to drive, to disaster. Perhaps this is a better way to settle accounts with your own unresolved conflicts. or their own limitations. This is not a way to educate about love. Because when one says that love is satisfied with the happiness of the other, it does not refer to the laziness of the other, but to its realization.
Many parents are afraid of their children. Fear is justified, especially given that in all Western countries physical assaults on parents have increased, in some others less, but in general the percentages already reach two digits, many children physically punish their parents. Others punish them emotionally. It seems that an important part of society is being intimidated by “gamins”.
Many parents also can’t make decisions without first consulting with their child. At the end of the day, there’s a question: do they ask you or?They’re asking for your permission? They may want to go on vacation to Grandma’s house, but the child doesn’t like it, so first they ask you to avoid problems, parents fear their reactions and the damage they can cause.
What results from this kind of creation are essentially useless people, but not just that. They also become indolent, falsely convinced, bigoted and selfish. Exactly the kind of people a parent doesn’t want near their child. Exactly the kind of human beings who live unused, not even for themselves.
Grandparents and great-grandparents used “belt pedagogy. “It is not necessary to transform children into suffering to form responsible adults, in fact it is a path more reprehensible than excessive permissiveness because it jeopardizes the integrity of the child.
However, one thing they were right about: the parent is the one who has an obligation to make the decision, they were also right to involve the children in household chores and to delegate responsibilities to them An abusive parent results in a diminished child. A permissive and obedient father raises useless children; a parent who knows how to carefully establish and maintain certain boundaries raises strong children.