There has been much talk about the importance of learning to say ‘no’, but little has been said about the importance of learning to listen ‘no’. Listening is as necessary as knowing how to speak; In life, there are dreams and desires that inevitably refuse. So, if we’re having trouble listening to one, right? Or face it in any situation, life becomes very difficult for us.
The stage of life where we have the most hearing problems is during childhood. This is normal, because as children we are extremely self-centered, because the ability to see situations collectively is something that develops over time, as long as creation helps us to do so.
- Isn’t it an encounter with boundaries and that.
- At first.
- It has something unpleasant.
- It is obvious that behind this there is a desire.
- And it clashes with the source that could grant it.
- Therefore.
- To a greater or lesser degree.
- There is frustration.
- This is not bad in itself.
- But it is a natural part of life and should be received like this: naturally.
“Limits define us. They define who we are and what we are not. Does a limit show me where the other person ends up and starts?-Henry Cloud-
We all know there are several types of “no. ” Some are temporary, others are permanent, so some involve giving up something that is not so relevant, while others involve giving up something that we value, love or need very much, no human being escapes these experiences.
Sometimes he doesn’t? It’s direct, like when you ask for something and something is rejected, other times it’s not the word itself, it’s the facts that tell you no, that this time you’ll have to postpone or give up a wish. there are implicit ones, which are communicated by gestures of rejection or apprehension.
Of course, it’s easier to hear one?When you know it’s a temporary or incipient denial. However, it can be difficult for some people to accept and even assimilate seemingly inconsequential denials. For most of us, the difficulty comes from “no. “. ” But why is it important to learn to listen to or accept them?
The source of it, right? He’s often someone else. The one that says, “Haven’t you been accepted? For work, design, college, promotion or whatever. Or the voice that says” Don’t touch me?” you don’t want to. Continue this relationship? You weren’t invited to the party.
This kind of denial leads us to a reality that sometimes costs us to accept: others do not have to assume our needs, our expectations or our desires, they are not to make life easier or sweeter, they have every right to impose limits. about situations that also involve them.
Does the difficulty in accepting them usually mean that we do not recognize the limits imposed by others. Interacting with the world is interacting with difference, and wanting something from others is not enough to achieve it. We changed a lot when we learned to listen to it?
Life nods are much stronger and irrational, since we were born we received a multitude of goods, but many others are also denied to us, the limitation comes into the world with us, and the mothers or fathers they choose to educate. that we try to prevent us from addressing these realities, we end up not helping each other.
We do not become strong when we lack limitations, but when we learn to recognize and manage them, there are many things that we will have to wait for, that we will have to fight for or that we simply will not achieve. or denying yourself is not the right way to avoid the consequences.
Are we much stronger and happier when we learn to listen? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Resisting only increases our frustration and distorts or evades our most authentic desires. we stop living the possible life and aspire to the impossible forever.