The influence of thoughts on how we feel is much greater than we think. Imagine you go to work and say a “Hello? All of them when they get to the office. Everyone responds, except a colleague who doesn’t even look directly at you. “.
Did I do something that made you mad at me?Maybe I was bothered by what I said the other day at the meeting, but it was nothing personal, did I just say my opinion as a professional?No, but isn’t that why, then why, are you rude!?
- Thus.
- Almost unintentionally.
- We enter a spiral of rumination of thoughts.
- And we may even be sad.
- Angry or nervous.
- Now.
- Has anything really happened to your colleague or to you?Maybe he didn’t answer because he was just focused on his work.
- And I hadn’t even heard it.
- Read on to understand what’s going on and how thoughts affect our discomfort.
“There is nothing good or bad, it is our thought that transforms you” – Hamlet-
As a general rule, when we experience negative emotions, we say that they are caused by specific situations or by actions of others, that is, we believe that our discomfort is caused by events beyond our control, that is, we do external. causal attributions on our feelings.
Therefore, we believe that we are angry because our colleague did not greet us, which we cannot control; rather than realizing that we can regulate the emotions that arise if we don’t focus on the actions of others, but on how we interpret them.
What does that mean? That we were really angry about our interpretation of the situation. Do we think he didn’t answer us because something happened or because he’s rude?Who wouldn’t bother thinking about that?The question is: what really happened, and objectively, shouldn’t bother us.
“Once we believe in something, this belief usually stays with us for the rest of our lives, unless we test it. “Richard Gillet
If instead of these thoughts, others appeared like, “Surely you didn’t listen to me?You think you’d feel the same way?Of course not. In fact, it probably wouldn’t bother us at all. This example highlights a reality that we are not always aware of, or which we do not even realize: the influence of thoughts on our discomfort.
This influence of thoughts on our discomfort also occurs when they are not true. The fact is, we generally don’t consider whether what we think is real or not. We think it’s fair, period. So, although the colleague has nothing to do with us, we think so, ???We warm our heads without really having any reason to worry, and in this way our anger grows.
“A lot of people really appreciate what it isn’t, and very little what it really is. “- Malcom Forbes-
This is because human beings usually need to know why things are. Therefore, if we do not have enough information about the facts, different types of distortions come into play and we draw conclusions that may not be entirely realistic. In this way, there are several negative emotions that would not be present if we could adjust more to reality.
No one has taught you that what you think may not be true, if we can learn to challenge the internal dialogue we have with ourselves, we will be able to regulate our emotions more effectively, in fact, the influence of thoughts on discomfort can also be used for our advantage But how?Use positive suggestions to replace these negative perceptions.
It is important to understand how we can manage what goes through our heads, the reality is that it is not easy, but with hard work and perseverance we can achieve it, the first step is to understand and internalize the influence of our thoughts on our discomfort, to become aware of the importance of questioning and changing thoughts that do not adapt to reality Work for your well-being!
Images courtesy of Roberto Nickson.