Who doesn’t like being motivated? To take advantage of this impulse that drives us to follow, to move forward, to whisper to us that it is possible to realize our dreams and that encourages us to fight because we are inspired is really fascinating, yet many fall into the trap of motivation. when their strengths weaken and there are disappointments and doubts, or when they want to achieve something but don’t know where to start.
“First of all, preparation is the key to success” – Alexander Graham Bell-
- According to English physician and psychotherapist Russ Harris.
- Not having motivation is impossible.
- Because in every action we take there is a certain degree of underlying motivation.
- One way or another.
- Every behavior we put into practice aims to accomplish something.
Have a conversation, eat candy, drive, inform us that we are sick, make a phone call, sit on the couch, read a book or talk about any topic; each of the above actions has a purpose, an intention, a motivation, even if we do not realize it.
So what is motivation? According to Harris, in the desire to do something, to be motivated is not to feel a powerful magic that makes us act suddenly, nor a divine inspiration that floods us, but rather to want to do something, so no more.
To better understand this, let’s present an example. Someone’s been writing a book for months, but a week ago he realized he was unmotivated because he didn’t have time and came home tired of work. She no longer writes and spends this time watching TV or lying on the couch.
In this situation, the desire to watch TV or lie on the couch is much greater than the desire to keep writing the book, the person thinks they want to write, but does not have the desire or time, is exhausted. What is the purpose of watching TV or staying on the couch?
Maybe it’s relaxing, comfortable or quiet, that is, feeling good in the short term avoiding the hassle of writing, what happens is that in the long run it doesn’t help the person achieve their sleep.
In fact, instead of being unmotivated, what happens is that the motivation to avoid discomfort and do what you want in the long run is to motivate you to write, publish a book and share the best of yourself with others.
So when we say we’re not motivated, what we really mean is that we want to do something that’s important to us, but that we’re not ready to implement if we’re not happy, confident, confident, and full of energy.
So, as long as we’re tired, insecure, wary, or lazy, will we hardly devote ourselves to this task?
Don’t sit around waiting for things to happen to you, fight for what you want, take responsibility for yourself?. – Michel Tanus
If we understand motivation as a feeling, it’s very likely that we’ll finally get ponded, so when we feel good, positive and excited, we’ll say we’re motivated, but if those feelings fade or disappear, we’ll say we’re not motivated for what?
It’s very simple. Motivation as a feeling leads us to fall into the trap of trying to feel the right feelings before taking any action, so we are stuck in the wait.
It’s the motivation trap. The question is: do you really think motivation will magically appear?
If we recognize motivation as a desire, without as a feeling, everything will be different, because it will be possible to change our behavior, in this way we will be able to evaluate the different desires that we have and recognize what motivates each of our decisions.
Furthermore, we can distinguish between wishes to prevent discomfort and those that are in line with our values.
It is up to us to want a life governed by avoidance or a life governed by our values, we must not forget that one of our most fundamental instincts is the desire to avoid discomfort, so it is not possible to eliminate this trend, but to decide to act according to our values, not that we have to be motivated, but committed to what we want.
Thus, according to Russ Harris, committed action is the first step; Motivation comes later, that is, first actions and then feelings. It is much more rewarding and satisfying to act according to our values.
The feelings we desire may come later, although this does not always happen, because there is no guarantee about feelings.
In the motivation trap we must add all the messages that the media constantly sends us, some books and people about the strategies necessary to be motivated, which usually mention two aspects: discipline and willpower.
What’s going on is that if we believe that, we’ll fall back into the motivation trap.
If we think about it, we will realize that discipline and willpower are other ways to name the commitment according to a set of values, as well as to do whatever it takes to achieve what we want, although sometimes we don’t want to.
It is necessary to reject the belief that will magically appear and begin to cultivate an attitude committed to our goal, because we must not forget that, first of all, it must be consistent with our values, no matter how we felt. The habit is established, the feeling of discipline or will will will appear.
Therefore, it’s time to get out of the motivational waiting room and take the step to commit to your goal based on your value system. Only then will this desire that we so desire and which, in a way, pushes us to realize our dreams will be born.