The way he describes others defines him, the way he labels, judges and evaluates those around him allows him to see something of his personality, they are subtle traits, but not always evident in his identity and even in his self-esteem. it is something that we see every day and that we also suffer when others attribute characteristics that have nothing to do with us.
We must admit that we all make judgments about those who cross our path, to do this is a necessity for the brain to try to control our environment and to know, in a way, something we are going to find ourselves. with a perfectly normal, if not completely logical, psychological process, a mechanism controlled by the amygdala for its usual purpose of ensuring our survival.
“The discretion of words is worth more than eloquence. “Francis Bacon?
A very interesting survey conducted by the New York University of Psychology and published in the Journal of Neuroscience explains that this small brain structure evaluates, in a few milliseconds, whether someone is reliable or not, whether the person interests us or, on the contrary. , if it’s someone it’s better to avoid it.
We could say, almost unequivocally, that for our brain the first impression is everything, although, of course, there are small interesting variations.
In this way, when the cerebellar amygdala very quickly evaluates whether someone can trust, the one who enters the image is the filter of our personality, it will be he who, despite this initial assessment, chooses to go (or not) to that. person to check if the first evaluation is correct.
It is essentially the one that articulates, intercedes and determines how we relate and treat others.
A Chinese proverb says that sometimes you can crush a person with the weight of the tongue, this is a great truth and no one can doubt how the movements of the tongue (without the need for a bone) can hurt so much and cause so much damage This is something that most of us see, daily, in almost every context : at work, at home, with friends, etc.
We maintain communication with others as part of our own socialization processes, so during these interactions it is very common to seem kind, correct and careful, however, if there is a widespread virus is the exercise of criticism, the use of labels, contempt and even the most despicable offense.
Profiles that like to attribute negative characteristics to other people are almost all too common, such as daily exercise, as a habit that, more than a punctual whim, is a tradition.
Are you what you’re saying? This statement is not ours, but that of Dr. Skowronski of Wake Forest University, North Carolina. Who conducted very detailed research on the personality styles and attributions they made.
In this document it became clear that we have all felt: the way you describe others defines you, we are what we say, we are everything we discuss and project on those around us.
Some people don’t want to see. The one who always wears his sunglasses and, with his short-sighted eyes, enters a blurry world of which he is better to distrust, are convinced profiles of stereotypes that they do not want to see anything else. despise and despise those who make jokes and criticize those who are not, think and feel things like that.
If the way he describes others shows his personality, those who always use negative and critical labels show an inner void where there is a lack of self-esteem, where the use of offense allows us to deduce both frustration and unhappiness.
Research at Wake Forest University has found something very curious, the people who least made judgments were the ones who showed the greatest capacity for association, so those who are characterized by being more positive, optimistic and have good self-esteem are not. as convinced by these previous assessments and I prefer, first of all, to have contacts and get closer.
When we allow ourselves to set aside the use of valuations, labels and conclusions that are invalid or invalid, they increase the possibilities of association with those around us, to create new, more sustainable friendships, to build more respectful environments, with much less. Harm. .
When you describe others without the burden of mistrust, prejudice and mockery, you allow, almost unknowingly, the opportunity to create greater synergy with the people around you, without the barriers of stereotypes and labels.
Excessive use of sunglasses should be avoided. They will be very useful to protect us from certain harmful effects, but it is always better to remove the filters and enlarge the view to the maximum, an intelligent, interesting and humble look will always capture more things than the eyes accustomed to seeing the darkness themselves.