Like any other game, you can improve seduction, knowing the rules and strategies that psychology offers can help you in this goal.
The game of seduction, contrary to what many people may believe, is not a concept that applies only to the sexual or erotic sphere. In our daily lives, are there many situations that require?Seduction? One way or another.
- Isn’t the job interview some kind of seduction?Or make a presentation to a hearing? To seduce is to convince or persuade a group of people or an individual to choose you or the object or idea of your interest in a particular context.
The word?Seduction? It comes from the Latin seducere, which combines the suffix (separation) with the verb ducere (guide or direct), this involves separating or directing someone to change course or position, that is the original definition. However, throughout history, the word has received different meanings.
In the Latin translation of the Bible, where this verb begins to have a more concrete connotation, its definition merely means the act of deceiving or hiding information to obtain a reward, the best-known example is the serpent in the Eden Orchard, which seduced Eve.
However, in this article we will talk about the most popular understanding of the word seduction, which implies a suggestion or persuasion to achieve an erotic encounter or any kind of erotic or emotional connection.
Yes, of course. Seduction is a complex game, it can be fun and enjoyable, but it can also be unfair, painful and frustrating, but it’s still a game. If you want to play, you have to understand it, you have to understand your tricks, rules, risks, limits and time.
When you have all this information you can decide whether you want to play or not, whether you want, you will know how to play and you will know what you are getting into, because you will have considered all aspects of the game and because, in the balance, pleasure and satisfaction have weighed more than pain and suffering.
Seduction is not a zero-sum game in which one person wins and the other loses. Think of it as a cooperative game; participants do not compete, but are looking for something that is mutually beneficial. Even more than a cooperative game, if the seduction process becomes a cooperative effort, it’s an unequivocal sign that you’re playing well.
Just as we try to insert seduction into game theory, it is also necessary to separate it from some of the myths surrounding it. Seduction is not mathematical, so it is neither accurate nor very predictable.
Movies similar to Hitch? Conselheiro Amoroso (2005) reinforced the idea that gurus have impeccable advice to find a partner or seduce someone, however, this is far from reality. There are many variables involved in seduction and it is impossible to control them all.
Fortunately, psychology helps to better understand seduction, psychology research has identified the variables that are decisive in the game, when faced with them you will be ready to give your best.
These variables are not tips, standards, or instructions that work for anyone in any context, it’s just information to keep in mind when playing seduction.
The more you know all aspects of yourself, the better you can set limits on what you like and don’t like. It also helps to know how far you’re willing to go in this game.
In some contexts you do better, while in others you have more difficulties, knowing the difference is much more difficult than it seems, but very important if you want to be good in this game.
This is one of the variables that can cause the most discomfort, expectations are usually a source of misunderstandings and confusion when you don’t consider them, setting realistic expectations is a way to avoid uncomfortable situations and avoid suffering.
If your expectations are too high, you may be easily frustrated in a relationship with someone else. On the other hand, setting very low expectations can prevent you from feeling relaxed and confident.
With regard to basic psychological processes, attention, for example, is the process that distinguishes between what is important and what is not, making it an important variable in the game of seduction.
Attention allows you to focus your cognitive resources on actions such as actively listening to the other person and paying attention to your physical characteristics, the way you dress, your style and all the keys to context that provide a type of information that you consider relevant and prioritizing them over other stimuli.
It is the ability to obtain information about your environment through your senses, while attention allows you to focus and differentiate stimuli, perception allows you to process and interpret them so that you can choose the best option to interact with the other person.
In seduction verbal and nonverbal signals are very important, as well as important stimuli that may seem irrelevant, such as odors, as researchers discover new aspects about pheromones and other olfactory sciences.
Getting information from your playmate is not the only important thing, it is also crucial to remember this information and be able to use it. There are two types of memory when it comes to storing information:
These are the resources you’re willing to use to get a specific result, that is, your motivation represents the level of interest you have in something.
In the game of seduction, it’s positive to do a little thought exercise to find out how motivated you are and make sure you’re playing with the person you want and how you want them, and not because there’s another reason other than. related to the game itself.
There are two types of motivations
Emotions are the essence of the game of seduction, we said at first that seduction is not always pleasant, but that it always generates emotions, if you don’t, it may not be the game for you.
Moreover, on this hypothetical scale where the advantages of the game outweigh the disadvantages, emotions must be more or less present. Whether or not the game provokes emotions in your decision to seduce or not at some point.
Sexual or erotic desire is a complex concept, difficult to describe and with a strong power of motivation, it also plays a key role in seduction, it would be illogical to try to seduce someone for whom you have no sexual desire, desire is another variable that you should take into account in the game of seduction, since it can determine the way you play.
When you seduce someone, you have a specific goal in mind, there are two types of directions that have to do with the goal, the satisfaction of your desires and your nature.
There is the question of who you love, which represents the desire of a specific person. You don’t think too much about this wish or a possible future relationship. On the other hand, there is the object of your desire, which refers more to the desire to perform a specific type of erotic activity. Here, being able to do that particular thing matters more than who you’re doing it with. To seduce someone, you have to adapt your way of playing according to the direction of your desire.
Here we mean how you play and the behavior mechanisms you activate to seduce the person you love, your personality traits play an important role in determining these roles, there are two trends:
Gender is a social construct that certainly influences seduction, if you compare a woman and a man of the same age, with the same academic training, similar personality traits and living in the same place, your stories related to seduction will probably remain very different.
The reason is that the game of seduction is still strongly influenced by machismo, socially it is even more accepted that men take the initiative than women, making it difficult for a woman to dare to seduce someone however she wants, especially if she takes the initiative. Initiative.
In your own social circles you must strive to break with these archaic stigmas associated with the seduction initiated by women, in this way we can balance the game and all, men and women, can play by the same rules.