In one of the scenes from Paolo Sorrentino’s film “Youth”, the character played by Rachel Weisz asks her father (Michael Caine) why her husband prefers the other woman, tries to escape the answer and finally says: because she is good in bed. This shows us how, in the absence of a good explanation of the breakup of couples, we can invent one that protects us.
Each couple is a different world with many peculiarities. Features that change over time, trying to adapt to a changing reality. A reality in which the couple can lie unintentionally, gradually and without realizing the changes, until the day they realize that the person they sleep with every night is a stranger.
- The number of divorces today is huge.
- In addition.
- All these separations must be added to those made by unwr married couples.
- It is a fact that hides many feelings and behind which there are several reasons.
Sometimes, for fear of our partner’s reaction, we hide behind worldly phrases like “The problem isn’t you, it’s me?” I’m not in love anymore?”Or” I fell in love with someone else. ” But deep down, there are reasons we don’t dare put into words, keep reading this article to see some of them.
Both in romantic relationships that are just beginning and in lasting ones, it is quite common to have a great fear of expressing feelings, a fear that arises mainly when one of the members of the couple begins to be afraid of being vulnerable. feeling that communicating your pain or joy conveys information to your “rival companion” to win all conflicts.
On the other hand, we are afraid to hurt or be hurt by telling the truth, in this way, by shutting up about what we need, we prevent the war of affront and pain from starting, so are we accumulating and accumulating?And everyone knows what happens when there’s nothing left.
Walter Riso pleads in his “practical guide not to suffer in love”. that one of the best ways to end love is indifference. I would say that more than love, indifference is the most corrosive acid that can exist in any kind of relationship. She sends a clear message: “I don’t care about you. I don’t care what you think, what you feel or what you do.
In addition, indifference is often mixed with pride. Think, what do you usually do when someone shows you indifference? The most normal reaction is that you too are indifferent, that is, “if you don’t talk to me, I don’t talk to you either. “Indifference is therefore not only dangerous in itself, but it also makes us very stubborn.
We need to understand this in a social context. Most young people feel more and more that life is too long, that they still have much to live with, to live before choosing the person with which they will share the rest of their lives, so the lack of commitment in the 21st century is linked to the fear of losing experiences, to having to explain from the beginning.
For older adults the situation is more complex and fears are often different, many of these people may have had previous relationships in which they felt betrayed, having built their whole lives around the relationship, are afraid of commitment because someone has already deceived them.
On the other hand, there are other people who are already starting a new relationship with older or younger children, so the choices they have to make no longer affect them directly, but also their children, if it is a bad choice.
Love is not necessarily eternal or fixed. Just as everything that happens around us changes, so do our feelings. In fact, love itself changes. It’s no longer about loving more or less, but with different nuances.
Many couples end the relationship because they had to, because they were exhausted. They were terribly beautiful, without losing an iota of truth because they were not eternal, and they died to make room for others. To understand this is to blindfold so as not to see or assume our own nature.
Scientists at the University of Western Ontario in Ontario, Canada, have selected 6,500 people (men and women) to participate in a study and discover the real reasons couples end their love.
The study consisted of conducting several interviews with each person in the selected group, and eventually the researchers concluded that the main reasons couples usually separate are:
Humor is fundamental in all areas of our lives, whether personal, professional and, of course, romantic relationships. A person who makes us laugh and who has a sense of humor conquers us, entertains us and makes us feel full and happy.
Learning to smile and share with our partner can unite us, while being very serious and losing a sense of humor can negatively affect our relationship. A person who is always sad or serious gives us negativity.
Another reason couples separate, according to the study, is lack of confidence. A lot can happen in a relationship, but if we find that the other person hasn’t been honest or hasn’t lied about something, we quickly lose confidence in ourselves.
Once trust in our partner is lost it is very difficult to recover it, because there will be a lot of fear and a lot of doubts among the couple, overcoming this situation is a very difficult obstacle.
Lack of intimacy with our partner is one of the reasons couples tend to end the relationship, because not wanting to have moments of intimacy with our partner is a form of indifference and indifference, as we have said before, gradually ends with any relationship.
In intimacy, in the case of couples, we include sex, at the beginning of relationships sexual desire is usually strong, but there comes a time when the routine is installed and that desire is affected, it is affected by haste, worries and other illusions. who rivals the beloved.