Excessive self-esteem is neither positive nor healthy. This overconfidence, combined with the overvaluation of the ego, often leads to problematic behaviors and attitudes.
An example is that of people who go through life with an air of superiority, refusing to accept their own mistakes and, in turn, manifesting obvious narcissism.
- We know that the issue of self-esteem is undoubtedly one of the favorites in the field of personal growth.
- Every year many publications designed to teach us how to reinforce this fundamental psychological aspect for our well-being are launched to the publishing market.
However, one thing that is not always talked about is the slightly darker opposite of this dimension.
For example, one thing to be clarified is that the antidote to low self-esteem is far from excessive self-esteem, any excess is dangerous and harmful.
So, if we lack something, we should not cover it up in large quantities, so instead of solving the situation, we create a new problem.
Therefore, it is important to clarify what we mean by sound self-esteem, we live in a time when it is common to convince ourselves of the need to maximize areas such as leadership, self-esteem and self-confidence.
But we have to consider this: the more there is, the better, it’s not always positive or appropriate. So, let’s see where the limit of true well-being is.
“Have faith in what’s in you. ” ? Andre Gide?
One of the most interesting books by social psychologist Albert Bandura is undoubtedly “Self-efficacy in different contexts”.
What has become clear in this work is that aspects such as perception of effectiveness and self-esteem are two key factors in overcoming difficulties and achieving our realization in every field of life.
Now, among the most harmful dynamics that prevent human beings from achieving not only their goals, but also happiness, is low self-esteem and excess, both very negative. Let’s see what a person with exaggerated or excessive self-esteem looks like.
There is one aspect that stands out frequently in the field of child psychology: our children need to understand from the beginning that the world has limits, that there are rules and that we do not always get what we want.
Learning to tolerate frustration is a central issue in life and not doing so can certainly create problems.
Many children and young people are educated with the idea that they can have whatever they want, they are little emperors who feel worthy and have enough authority to do, get and have everything they want.
Educating them to have such an inflated and excessive self-esteem leads them to be self-centered, abusive, arrogant and without control of their impulses.
Excessive self-esteem and its dangers usually arise from education
In addition to what we may think, having a 200% self-esteem reserve will not lead our mechanism to the pinnacle of success.
Criminal behavior has long been associated with low self-esteem, however, in recent years, excessive self-esteem has also been shown to correlate with acts of violence.
A study by Dr. Robert Roy F. Baumeister of Princeton University explains that “own superiority” is a decisive factor in many criminal acts.
There are many criminal profiles characterized by this dark triad, in which narcissism, Machiavelism and psychopathy go hand in hand with excessive self-esteem that justifies and validates their unfavorable behavior.
They are people with excessive self-esteem and with the awareness that they can have everything they want, no matter the means to achieve it.
As can be seen, the reverse of self-esteem hides a darkness and danger to consider. Of course, low self-esteem has its risks, as does the other end.
The key is to strike the balance to find a healthy appreciation of ourselves and, of course, respect for others.
Self-esteem is the art of caring for oneself, never the unhealthy excess that leads to narcissism.