In reality, there are many secrets to initiating liberating dialogue, because it is a real art: knowing how to communicate, to know how to say and to understand, you have to learn to overcome silences, pause and intervene at the right time. , you must be able to listen and have the ability to understand others in your own context.
When we talk about “liberating dialogue,” we mean that form of conversation that allows the people involved to really express themselves. To express is to get out of jail without being able to communicate. Therefore, liberating dialogue must first and foremoscy be a space in which everyone can communicate with authenticity.
- While many dialogues may be minor.
- Many others are of particular importance.
- And in these dialogues it is necessary to know what has been said and what has been silenced.
- We need to speak the same language and establish a real connection with the other person.
- To achieve real communication.
Many people feel a great need to be heard, that’s why they talk and talk, talk and talk, and it can be uncomfortable for those around them, sometimes this need to communicate constantly comes from a deep self-centeredness, but other times it is simply a reflection of anxiety or a need for self-affirmation.
Not everyone understands the value of silence, and not everyone understands that communication is a two-way process in which each party has the right to speak and the duty to shut up, hence supposed dialogues arise, which in practice are authentic monologues.
It can therefore be said that the first condition for engaging in liberating dialogue is to have developed the ability to understand and value silence, not that silence that means absence, but the silence of listening, listening and recognizing what the other says.
Dialogue between two people is only genuine if there is also an innocent intention for dialogue, this implies the will to listen, the fact that we are willing to strive to understand, in this sense, to shut up while the other speaks is not enough, it is about being mentally active in this silence.
When there is an authentic willingness to dialogue, a serene, understanding and curious listening appears, listening serenely means that to speak you have to choose a time when emotions do not exalt and if they are it is important to make sure that you have the ability to control them.
Active listening is a curious listening. It doesn’t just shut up and validate everything the other has said, but it’s a listener that seeks to get more information to better clarify or understand what the other is saying, questions are a great way to connect and, moreover, provide evidence to the other person that they are being heard.
Global listening refers to the desire to put yourself in each other’s place and to be able to capture what you feel when expressed, is to be aware of the feelings and emotions that pass through the nonverbal channel. dialogue is something that goes beyond words, it also means capturing the feelings that arise in communication.
Taking a judge’s position, as if the other person were on trial or if an accused person were to be tried, will never be a good way, in fact, it just opens the door to mistrust, fear, tension and lack of communication.
No one wants to talk to someone who judges him or wants to “give him a moral lesson. “In liberating dialogue, uncomfortable aspects, difficult confessions, or perhaps even truths that the other person does not want to hear may emerge. dialogue becomes truly liberating, but this is not possible if one of the people involved is able to censor or direct the behavior of the other.
You should also be well informed about the topic or problem before giving an opinion, in fact, the best arguments usually come from people who have suffered the same problem and who have some experience in this field, in many cases professional help is the best option.
It is essential to reach the greatest degree of connection with the other person, as well as it is very healthy and convenient to listen carefully, without making interruptions or departing from the subject, however, we often feel that it is necessary to interrupt the dialogue because we can forget about some of the points raised by the other person on which we have comments or adjustments to make.
In such cases, it is best to write down the most important points and let that person speak without being interrupted, so when the person is finished, you can repeat the point-by-point argument and express your own opinion. without turning dialogue into something rigid, strict or military.
The environment or context of the conversation can also be important, if the topic is sensitive or requires a higher level of attention, it is best to look for a place that avoids interruptions or that intimate material is shown in public. The place contributes to the development of dialogue.
Based on everything we’ve said above, you can apply five basic rules so that a dialogue actually becomes a liberating experience for the parties involved: