If we want to keep a nice memory of those who have already left, the main thing is to evoke their smile, doing this is a way to generate positive feelings that, while they still have notes of sadness and melancholy, can help us not tarnish your image with them.
However, our grief involves certain phases necessary to manage the thoughts, behaviors, feelings, and emotions that generate the losses of those we love or are important in our lives.
- Similarly.
- What we need to keep in mind is that we cannot get used to the death of the people we love.
- And therefore every loss will test us or force us to manage our resources one way or another to resist the situation.
Saying goodbye to those who have left is a process that, one way or another, is not just a farewell, it is difficult to understand and many times we think that we have to face loss to stop: thinking, feeling or behaving?According to what she assumed we would. However, it is a process consisting of some phases:
According to bereavement specialist Elisabeth Kl’ber-Ross, at first we usually act by denying reality and trying to convince ourselves that ‘are we all right?or that “this person’s death does not exist. ” We could say that this denial is as normal as it is temporary when we lose someone because we have to cushion the impact.
Let’s say we have to pause our minds to face an extremely painful reality, let’s say that this defense mechanism offers a certain emotional distance that is necessary so that we can calmly put in place a scheme that allows us to adapt. to this event.
There will come a time, and everyone has their time, in which we will finally see that we have really lost that person. Does this often make us feel the need for revenge?For the loss, for the feeling of having a knife nailed. chest that prevents us from breathing. ? Isn’t that fair?”Why her (and not me)?” Why now?” We said anger to life, to God (if you believe it) or to the world.
It is also common to see the conscious or unconscious idea of “trying to do something to find a life worthy of being lived in your absence. “You can even think about meeting family members or any other means to postpone death. Here we try to negotiate with the idea we have of a higher power (God or other conceptions), ask for more time or the opportunity to say these?I love you?? I love you, we haven’t said that in our lives.
Finally comes the moment when we understand death through a feeling of being trapped and extremely sad, this is the stage at which we cry heartbrokenly and cannot sustain ourselves.
It is likely that over time we will come to understand that death is irretrievable and that the best way to remember those who have gone so far and loved is to evoke their smile.
A loss cannot be treated in terms of overstealing or oversizing, because it involves giving up the reality that accompanies it and resigning itself to?Forget, absent people, being able to accept death as part of life?you have to allow yourself to feel and not force yourself to “recover”?quickly.
Giving us time, giving meaning to this loss and ritualizing it in a way that makes sense to us is essential when it comes to allowing us to live life, so for every loss we suffer in our lives, we must allow ourselves to honor our memories.
There will come a time when, naturally remembering the smiles of those who are not, their memory will not disturb our minds, but will help us understand that even if they are not physically present, they will always be in our hearts.