We have all fallen into the terrible trap of judging others at some point in our lives, but why does this common fact refer this way?Every time we make a judgment about someone, we create one or more stories that can be far from reality, the stories we make up.
Think of that mother who’s always late to take her son to school, maybe you think of her as a bad mother, or that lazy woman who likes to sleep late, or the mess that can’t organize her life. Do you think this is all true? What you imagine isn’t always the right thing to do.
People are quick to judge others, but it’s slow to correct themselves.
Without realizing it, you can guess what can happen in that person’s life. Have you fallen into the trap of supplementing with information you don’t know about a story you’ve invented?You’re wrong and you don’t realize it. We all have to wear special glasses to better see reality.
The reason we judge others so recklessly is related to our own ego. Consciously or unconsciously, we must feel better than others or express our rejection of a particular attitude. When we judge, we close the door to empathy.
When we talk about being empathetic to others, a lot of people say, “Yes, I’m empathetic. “If a friend sells me and needs to be heard, I am able to put myself in his place, to understand and encourage without falling into the temptation to judge. Sure, you’re empathetic, but only with the people you know; with others, you fall into the trap of judgment.
We must believe that we are superior, special and different. We prefer to observe from a safe distance the person we think is not well. We think so because it feeds our ego and somehow makes us feel better about ourselves.
“The size of a person’s ego can be measured by the way he handles the mistakes of others. ” David Fishman.
Have you ever felt isolated because no one understood you?Surely the phrase “if they knew what I was going through, what I was going through. “He went through his mind more than once. All these people think you’re judging without really knowing what’s happening to them. It’s very different to see things with each other, isn’t it?
Besides, you think you’re right and the other person isn’t doing the right thing, but who are you to judge them?You don’t know what happened in your past, are we perfect?We all have the right to make mistakes and even take this opportunity to learn.
Let’s go back to the example of the carefree mother with her child, at least that’s what you think, maybe she lives under the rule of an abusive husband, suffers from depression or has a family member who recently passed away and loves her. A lot. We do not like these explanations because they would force us to get involved in the situation; it’s not easy.
On the other hand, we do not live each other’s lives; what we are living is what prevents us from getting up every morning, perhaps that’s why we signal our weakness in each other.
If you think the other one is acting so bad, if your attitude bothers you and you point the finger at it, why don’t you ask him what’s going on?If you were in one of the above situations, you might even be grateful if a completely unknown person cared about you, because maybe that’s what’s missing in your life.
It can be the beginning of a beautiful friendship, or just a situation where you come to give it the affection the other needs, surely at some point you would have liked someone to do something similar with you: instead of ignoring or ignoring you. seeing you with eyes full of negative judgments, opens your arms with understanding and understanding.
However, we are afraid to ask. If we did this, all our prejudices would collapse, we would have to dismantle the pattern we built in our minds and our ego could be affected. One way or another, we protect ourselves by falling into one of the deadliest traps: constantly criticizing the other.
Judging someone does not define who they are, but who defines who you are.
We always fall into the trap of judging others, we would avoid this type of trap by becoming aware of these processes that run automatically, so it was time to show interest in helping others, being patient and learning until we could act spontaneously.