Writer Dorothy Parker used to say that anyone who gets bored in quiet times is because she doesn’t know the stormy times. One way or another, one part of us is always revealed in these moments of rough seas, in those days when fate takes our balance to test us. It is at this stage of the complex existential journey that you discover your strengths.
Until then, you could say that people just improvise. This topic remains as interesting as it is revealing. A few years ago, Gallup, an American opinion poll company, wanted to know what types of forces were most common in the population. To do this, he developed a survey so that people can self-assess.
- Later.
- Psychologists Nick Epley and David Dunning pointed out something relevant on this topic.
- Many of us are inexperienced judges of our worth.
- There are those who magnify you and those who underestimate you.
- The best way to discover our strengths is to turn the mirror and see what others are saying.
Another way is to test yourself, sooner or later, the time comes when our true courage and our greatest forces emerge.
In 2004, Martin Seligman and Chris Peterson published a book entitled Character Strengths and Virtues: A Handbook and Classification.
This work was an antithesis of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders and focused on highlighting the talents, skills and values each person possesses.
This book has always attracted some criticism from the scientific community. Defining goodness, generosity or joy as strengths was, for many, more in the realm of moral virtues and not in the field of psychological skills.
Perhaps that’s why, in 2014, Laura King and Louis Trent, doctors at the University of California, brought a new approach that left out the?Virtues to speak of the “forces of the human personality”.
This approach was designed to find the values that allow us to better adapt to the changes and challenges of life, it is this emotional and psychological fabric that acts as a mediator between well-being, better decision-making and even our ability to reach our full human potential. Let’s look at more features.
Sometimes something unexpected happens: the loss of work, the end of a relationship . . . These facts put us to the test, immobilize us and, of course, hurt us, however, by overcoming them, you discover your strengths.
You realize there are resources in you that you didn’t know. Have you learned how to manage your emotions, manage pain, nurture hope and even motivation?
All these learnings are integrated into you and offer you a longer time on the road, a broader view, that’s when you start moving better, both on quiet and difficult days, you do it because you are clear about your goals, you know what you want and your personal compass is well calibrated.
Many of us have been used to our comfort zone for years, that stability where everything is under control, where everything is predictable and considered “guaranteed”, until, suddenly, the first crack appears and, in a short time, part of our safety zone It collapses and collapses, so we act, we react, and we realize that we have assets.
When he discovers his strengths, he feels more resilient than he thought, more creative, optimistic and proactive.
However, while sometimes a situational or experience request makes us react appropriately, it does not mean that it will happen in the same way, that is, today we may well have faced a failure at work, in the face of a problem lived in the relationship.
However, it is possible that, faced with another complicated situation, we will not take the same actions correctly, so what does that mean? This means that when you discover your strengths, you need to make sure that they continue to flourish.
The more you use them, the more they will grow and apply to many other areas of your life. If you have the ability to resolve an incident at work, this responsiveness should also apply to other scenarios in your daily life.
When you discover your strengths, your reality changes, however, for this to happen, we must align three forces, three exceptional processes that lead us to conquest, to advance in this struggle to overcome our fears, to give way to adversity. about emotion, thought and action.
Every force comes from an emotion, which invites us to overcome ourselves, to cross this bridge where fears and hopes remain. Using strengths also means making sure our thoughts are driven by motivation, trusting each other. Only in this way can we act without being immobilized by fear, without being surrounded by insecurity.
We’re going to have a little more confidence in the self-improvement engine that we all carry inside.