We could name any of the fairytale princesses we know. This complex originates from childhood and can affect personal and loving relationships in the future. If you have daughters, don’t hesitate to read this article where we’ll talk about a long story. tradition that you can contribute to conservation, even without realizing it.
It’s not bad to say that our daughters are the princesses of the house, because they really are, but what can be wrong is to create them so that they can sit and wait for Prince Charming, the same thing that happens in stories like Cinderella. .
- The idea that a handsome gentleman.
- In his armor and on horseback.
- Will save them to give them the kiss that will wake them from a great dream (as in Snow White).
- Or they will cease to be miserable and spend their lives cleaning the floor (as in Snow White).
- In Cinderella).
- It can be very beautiful in our imagination.
- But it really isn’t.
Cinderella’s complex (or syndrome) was studied by researcher Colette Dowling, who has published a book entitled “Cinderella Complex: Women’s Fear of Independence. “In short, it could be said that it is the unconscious desire of women to be protected or cared for at all times, setting aside their own tastes or activities. This may be due to pressures of creation or social or religious. Dowling says that this syndrome actually stems from the fear of independence.
The name of the study researcher is very accurate, we all know cinderella’s story: a young woman who spends all day caring for her mother-in-law and her evil sisters, cannot go to the Prince’s Ball, until a fairy godmother makes her a princess.
Later, he loses his glass shoe and the handsome prince goes from house to house, until he finds the owner of the shoe. According to this fairy tale, the woman must be innocent, beautiful and resigned and, of course, dependent on her husband. , prince blue.
In the book of “Cinderella”, the fairy godmother transforms the protagonist into a princess and, as a result, the male model meets the princess at the dance. Thus, as Dowling says, a woman can only change the course of her life through the relationship she establishes with a man; otherwise she would be a slave or employed for the rest of her life.
Certainly many women think that this is an attack on the feminine essence, which must be independent in all its activities, others feel that it is not bad for men to take care, for example, of holding the house while engaged. to take care of their children and clean the house.
Initially, this complex prevents women from developing their skills, in addition to taking care of the house or caring for children, times have changed a lot and today the only goal of most women is not to marry and start a family, because aspire also to develop a good career.
When they marry, both men and women have the right to continue to fight for their particular goals and dreams. Cinderella syndrome indicates that this is not the case, as the woman has to stay home while she is at home. Protected by the husband.
A woman very dependent on her partner suffocates them both. Why this complex from? Princess rescued from the highest tower in the castle? It can seriously affect marriage. Life as a couple is not a fairy tale, so if a woman does not trust herself and make her own decisions, everything can get worse for both of them.
Although we all need affection, protection and d? Be saved?At some point in life this cannot be a rule, but an exception. A hug that saves us from a bad day is perfect and very pleasant, as well as a word of comfort in a difficult situation.
Finally, cinderella’s complex is negative because it does not allow women to achieve their personal goals, making them unhappy, depressed, resigned and frustrated.
This is a topic that deserves to be analyzed in detail, there are situations in which, at the time of divorce, the woman realizes that she has no way forward, both emotionally and economically, then choose another man to keep you in this fairy tale and everything becomes a vicious circle.
If you are a mother (or parent) of daughters, give them the power to study and prepare, teach them that you need to have some work knowledge and experience before you get married or start a family.
If you have children, familiar with household chores. In this way, girls will not have to take on all the “female” tasks, as stipulated by society.
Raise sons and daughters who are able to achieve their goals and fulfill their dreams and, in the future, aspire to a healthy and balanced relationship. First, be sure to treat them like princesses (or princes) who know what they want.