The expectations of others represent, in many cases, the loss of originality and personality of the individual who is the target, in addition, depending on the stage of life in which the person is located, the expectations of others will affect him in One way or another.
Expectations are preconceived ideas that help us manage the huge amount of data we are exposed to, that is, they help us to better understand the environment in which we are, to better manage the uncertainty of not knowing all the details to make decisions.
- At the same time.
- Expectations help us maintain emotional stability by providing us with the information we need to know how we should anticipate events that may occur.
- In that sense expectations are very useful.
- But we have to accept that they are not.
- Necessarily real in this way.
- They won’t always materialize.
- And we shouldn’t feel losing for it.
The expectations of others can have an impact on us in a way that makes us lose our originality.
Expectations are useful for understanding the world around us and helping us to be a part of it, we are largely the result of continuous modeling from childhood, in fact this modeling was done in reference to our parents, guardians, teachers, friends and others who accompany (or have accompanied us) throughout our lives.
We are what all these people want us to be because adapting to the environment is a guarantee of survival, as social beings, humans need to live in harmony with others, and behavioral changes help perpetuate this fact.
In the same way, we create expectations in others, which not only helps them adapt, but also allows us to stop adapting to change others, this becomes a game of changes, with managers alternating
We all have a more or less marked personality, which affects us internally, interpersonally and in many other vital aspects, that is, as much as we are aware of the dynamics of the operation of expectations, the changes that others want to make about will not always convince us . That’s when the strength of personality comes into play.
Therefore, the truth is that we cannot adapt to all, because not everyone expects the same from us, so it is positive to accept this idea: we will not be able to please everyone, at the same time, nor our duty to meet the expectations of others.
We may face a major difficulty: expectations that we believe are not up to the task or that we will not live up to come from people on which our emotional, family, professional stability depends, etc.
If, by pygmaleo effect, a boss forms a negative image of an employee, he will act on this thought, even if the employee is not responsible for anything.
On the other hand, if when starting a relationship we expect more than actually happens, it is likely that this relationship does not develop in a healthy and positive way, and will eventually lead to frustrations, recriminations and other negatively charged emotions. .
In the field of education it has been proven that students well considered by teachers enjoy benefits in their training, receive more attention, receive feedback more often and when they make a mistake, they have more opportunities to correct it.
Although it is complicated, we can influence the image that others have of us, if this image is negative we can change the thought of the person with the way we act.
However, it is not always possible to change the expectations of others, so the ideal is to use our efforts to influence the expectations of the people we care about: family, friends, colleagues, etc. our stability depends largely on these people.
As human beings, mistakes are more important than blows, in this way it is easier to form a negative image of others, it is important to try to change this trend, because in the end we tend to confirm this image with our behavior. that we have formed. Thus, if we think that a certain person is shy, it is more likely that we end up behaving this way and that the other, in some way, ends up confirming our expectations.
Every time we pay attention to the influence of expectations, we contribute to our own health, on the other hand, we try to reduce the negative expectations of others, especially when they are unfounded, in this way you will help, at the same time, to ensure that others do not have negative expectations about you.