Everyday life is full of situations full of injustice that can lead to conflict. You wait in line and suddenly someone sneaks three people in front of you; or the trader is trying to charge you more for something you know is cheaper or your boss gives you an impossible order because you got up in a bad mood.
We are all free to choose which or which of these conflicting situations we will react to. Sometimes we buy the fight because it seems fair or reasonable. Other times, we lose it because it’s not worth spending energy on something that’s not important.
“Man finds himself when he encounters an obstacle. “Antoine Saint-Exupéry?
However, there are people who do not make that decision or, on the other hand, choose to give up any situation they face in advance, not only flee these clashes, but do not complain, demand or engage in any conduct involving direct conflict. What they feel is more than fear: they experience a feeling of helplessness that goes beyond reason.
Sometimes they ignore their fear. They simply say they prefer to be at peace and not fight anyone, for example, if they work as a group and some team members don’t do their part, they take on the task they have left to do just to avoid. a fight They will do a job that does not belong to them, so as not to conflict with each other.
Avoiding conflict is a worthwhile strategy, as long as you can avoid a greater evil. If you know that the other is absolutely categorical on a given subject, there is no point in challenging it. Or if there’s a rule you don’t like, but it’s already been warned that you can’t change it, there’s no need to start a confrontation.
However, there are many other cases where there is much more at stake, your rights, for example, or your dignity or the respect you deserve, in these cases you lose much more by not initiating a conflict than by avoiding it. you’re committing an injustice, when you’re doing something illegal or allowing a humiliating act. However, some people are silent and continue on their way as if nothing had happened.
The consequences can be serious, not only because the individual has accepted an offensive act, but also because it has an impact on his emotional balance, even if the person intends to go his way, no matter what injustice is committed against him, something In it you will complain, causing you frustration, discomfort, intolerance, anxiety or perhaps even physical illness.
On the other hand, these attitudes feed and nurture toxic social relationships, today we let go and the situation continues to repeat because the aggressor does not stop, because the other does not offer resistance, on the contrary, you will feel that you have a free field to move forward. Fleeing conflict does not mean resolving or eliminating them.
Avoid, run, let go? They are behaviors that we learn or teach most of the time, they make us believe that repressing, repressing or shutting down are valid and even desirable answers. A baby is born without knowing how to repress himself. It’s the people around you who teach you, because this makes it easier to control.
Those who evade conflict receive neither peace nor quiet in return. What are you doing? And they “accumulate. ” What usually happens is that the container fills up to overflow with something, this is what happens to those people who always shut up and scare those around them when they explode, sometimes these explosions, after a long period of containment, can have very serious consequences. Consequences.
When you remain silent in the face of injustice, you can first destroy your self-esteem. Without realizing it, you feed the idea that you’re powerless in all circumstances. And every day, he feels less capable of anything. Plus, it also damages your body. Highly restricted people are more likely to develop gastritis, ulcers, muscle problems and autoimmune diseases.
A relevant conflict should never be resolved. Nor is it healthy to go to the other end and react aggressively to the slightest problem, there are ways to get around, face and resolve conflicts, just as you have learned to avoid them, you will also learn how to manage them. In fact, conflict is positive because it allows us to grow, mature and gain independence. In addition, those facing conflict head-on tend to be more satisfied and happy people.