Why don’t I have the spouse I need to have?

At some point in life, we all ask ourselves the same questions: Who am I?Where am I going and with whom? The latter corresponds to the choice of our friends, but also of a companion, that being with the couple I want to have is a desire shared by most people.

Living with someone is a very important decision that deserves a previous analysis, although we have taken great steps in this direction, society continues to assume that we would all like to live as a couple and that, if we do not succeed, it is because they are not capable or attractive enough.

  • Why don’t I have the couple I want to have? This is one of the big questions many people have.
  • The result of their failures in previous relationships.

Social convenience encourages us to show our best side to our loved one, the brain produces a substance called phenylethylamine, which is a neurotransmitter that performs very important functions, such as increasing our motivation to collaborate or inhibit the feeling of hunger.

In this way, we can define social desirability as the need of the individual who has an experience of getting along with the experimenter, doing what he expects from him or her or her to favor in one way or another the experimental outcome that interests researchers. All this on an experimental level.

In practice, it means something like trying to look good with everyone or showing our best image, even if it is necessary to invent or distort it, but other factors also influence the choice of partner.

Not only are psychological elements mixed, but there are also false myths or beliefs, these beliefs are linked to the couple and, by the force of repetition, become a reality that interferes with relationships.

Do these beliefs from coexistence to sexuality, love, coexistence with children pass?And more. There is not a single space in our lives where beliefs are absent. Unfortunately, our ignorance gives them a real look.

Examples of these beliefs would be: “If our love is true, sex will always be wonderful,” “I’ll be the best lover you’ve ever had,” “Love in the couple can forgive everything. “

More examples: “If I don’t feel jealous in my relationship, don’t I really like this person?”, “Bad education is one of the most precious male traits”, “We can’t separate, we belong to each other!?”

The existence of half the orange remains a myth, this has more negative consequences than positive, looking for the other half means that we are incomplete, that we need someone to be happy.

After all, the existence of half the orange would imply that we are fragmented beings, in this case, it would be the couple’s responsibility to meet our expectations and deficiencies.

Belief in half of orange makes us believe that each other’s work is to complement us, so if our partner is incomplete, we will be responsible for making him happy. In your efforts to complement us, is it likely that he? Partner I want?end up leaving us even more incomplete.

This statement can be very categorical and dramatic, it is emotionally exhausting to live with someone in the sexual, psychological, social, economic, spiritual field, etc.

Life is full of options and we often choose to constantly complain about not having the partner we want. Let’s do a test: think about the things you don’t like about your relationship. These problems are certainly due to: not wanting to lose what we want. that we have to ‘aspire to the things we don’t have’. This is not a magic trick, it matches most people’s response.

Complaining about not having the desired partner is linked to several factors.

Ideal couples are based on appearances, they are people who try to hide their status as human beings and take refuge externally, in these cases social convenience also plays an important role.

As we have seen, there are a number of factors that make us complain about not having the partner we want, however, let’s not forget that there are real couples. They are flesh and blood, they carry in their backpacks the story of their lives, explained through their mania, their dreams, their fears and their illusions, just like you.

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