There may come a time when we plan to continue our relationship or not, discomfort, sadness, loneliness, and a sense of emptiness can become unbearable, even if we are with someone else. ?
If we take on the role of observers in analyzing such situations, we can see all the damage we are doing and change our perspective, not only in a romantic relationship, but also in a relationship of friendship or family, persisting and seeing everything collapse, including ourselves, may seem unnecessary from an external point of view.
- From the outside we see clearly.
- And sometimes also the person involved.
- However.
- The relationship resumes as if nothing.
- Despite the suffering.
- The damage suffered and the constant criticism.
Many people insist on a romantic relationship because that’s what they think they should do, throwing the towel at the first change is not an option, or at least they think so, because it would indicate that they have failed.
I’m sure you’ve heard that phrase more than once. It was probably pronounced by an older person or even by someone your age, the truth is that, looking back, it seems that the idea of insisting on a relationship, even if it wasn’t by choice or happiness, was a credit. if it were an obstacle course in which we would receive a medal. The one who won the most won.
Currently, the number of separations and divorces has increased. Many people are not afraid to say goodbye when their relationship is not going well. However, in many others, there is still the belief that “Bear” in a romantic relationship is a positive thing.
This may be because the ideals of romantic love are always valid in the minds of many people, as if letting time pass solves problems, the fact is that it takes commitment, feelings, the desire to continue and grow for well-being. of the couple.
Maybe we should clarify what the concept of “catching” means. In general, it is not a question of combating or overcoming a problem in the relationship, but of supporting something that should not be tolerated. To do this, it is important to differentiate between certain situations in which it may be beneficial to try, be present, and strive to move forward.
Below are some examples of difficulties that may exist in each relationship and that do not necessarily mean the end of the couple, since it is possible to solve the problem with effort or seeking professional help, however there are other types of resistances, which are needed. to get out of the relationship as quickly as possible.
Being in a relationship in which there is a lack of passion or in which it is not known to communicate is very different from staying in a relationship in which you suffer, the first case can be solved, even if it requires action. Second, most of the time it is better to finish everything, especially if our freedom and our ability to be happy are compromised.
On certain occasions we endure relationships where, in our moments of lucidity, we know that we would be better off without the other person, in fact, in these cases, is infidelity, abuse, manipulation, disrespect common?that our self-esteem and dignity are likely to be trampled on, if not already, but here we are trying to retain something that is collapsing.
Sometimes we feel that we have to insist on a relationship even if there is disrespect, mockery and manipulation, we ignore and justify all this because we are very much in love with this person, we are dependent or simply because we believe that we cannot choose. something better.
Sometimes we live these situations because we think they are synonymous with love. You can even believe this phrase that is heard daily in the songs and that is read in the love books: “Love must hurt”. But love isn’t that, it’s something completely different.
If for us the relationship is a torment, an expense of energy, a constant suffering, a way of enduring the unbearable, do we really think it is love?Or, on the contrary, do you allow anyone to hurt us?
No one in your sense seeks pain. When we inadvertently put our hand on the fire, we immediately remove it; on the other hand, when we’re in a relationship that hurts and burns, sometimes we stay there.
Challenging our beliefs about love, changing the perspective we have on that deep feeling, and worrying about cultivating our self-esteem is critical to having healthy relationships where it’s not a verb we have to pronounce.
Think now, what have you endured in the name of love?