Self-casing is useless. This irrational anger toward oneself, this way of treating oneself with contempt every time you feel shame or lack of control, or every time you fail or feel the rejection of others, is useless and unhealthy.
Self-care also involves self-inflicted wounds, insults, isolation, and a sense of not being worthy of others, yet you don’t solve anything when you punish yourself.
- You may know all this.
- But you still don’t know what to do to stop punishing you.
- How to get out of this destructive cycle of self-attacking.
- And evolve into a model of constructive behavior.
Self-cancer is so persistent because it is a defense against the pain of life, and life is full of pain.
We all have strong needs to connect with others, to be accepted, to succeed and to be approved, but we face the reality that sometimes others reject us, are disappointed in us and put their needs before our own. suffer and die, and our dreams don’t always come true.
When we feel this pain, we draw energy from it because we are willing to do something about it, this energy can be felt internally in the form of anger or anger, it motivates us to seek inner peace and overcome pain, pushes us out and trying to get what we want or need.
However, when we are again massacred, ignored, despised, or attacked for trying to meet our needs, the need for self-care can arise, and the same can happen if we neglect to seek that peace to overcome pain.
This gives the person a sense of insecurity or futility, and anger and anger eventually turn against themselves. At that moment, she begins to think of herself as the cause of the problem. Guilt leads the person to reject himself and feel the need to punish. himself.
These autoattacks are not seen as a threat, but as a form of hope that pain will alleviate the problem, but these punishments solve nothing and leave the person discouraged and isolated.
The person becomes so familiar with this attacking habit that he or she begins to feel it as a permanent part of who he is.
This anger against oneself can consume the person and prevent him from being present and committed to his own life. Your relationships, your relationships with yourself and others will further affirm the need for self-care, in a continuous cycle that is increasingly difficult to overcome. Counter.
To begin with, you should recognize that self-care can be deeply rooted, in fact, you may feel the need to punish yourself even more when you find out how much your pain has silenced your pain, but that shouldn’t stop you and you have. to be honest with yourself.
You need to focus beyond self-esteem. If you could find self-love and acceptance, that wouldn’t have happened, it’s true, but you have to start somewhere. Creating a more positive sense of yourself is very important to improve your well-being.
In addition to the need to punish yourself, you need help to relieve your pain, you also need a way to channel your anger. If you can’t do this alone, find someone to support you and guide you through this. Trip.
You should also feel a comforting sense of calm, as a first step in learning to relax when you feel the need to turn your anger against yourself.
Finally, it is important that you learn to feel compassion for the pain of others and to value human needs. Only then can he experience self-directed compassion and begin to appreciate himself.
Over time, you’ll realize that you have the ability to recover to cope with real pain and the ability to identify and pursue what you want and what you need. Bravely, you will free yourself from self-care and direct your world energy.
Original Spanish text by Eva Maria Rodriguez