? It was all my fault, and that’s why “do I deserve what’s wrong with me?” are all phrases we’ve had to utter at some point in our daily lives that we may have punished ourselves too much with.
The language we use has a direct impact on how we understand and interpret life, people are hardly aware of this inevitable effect, so we fall into the trap of taking to the extreme many of our negative experiences, we do so only by conditioning the words we use to express them.
- We all go through times when we don’t like how we behave.
- How we solve a situation or how someone made us feel bad about their words or actions.
- Sometimes we become very ourselves.
- Hurting and judging ourselves harshly.
What’s more, it’s probably something that’s already a thing of the past and doesn’t have a real impact in the present moment, yet we feel guilty and torture ourselves. Can we think about that?
“It’s all my fault. It is a phrase full of negative connotations, obscuring the reasoning capacity of our brain, because the emotion it produces in us is very intense. Still, it blocks all our resources and forces to deal with the situation successfully, even with a clear certainty that we are worthy of all the negative that is happening to us.
We can find a comparison between this belief and superstitions: irrational beliefs in which people accuse their incidents of spilling salt, breaking a mirror, or finding a black cat. These dangers are inevitable and nothing can be done to confront them, some say.
Is the human being responsible, not to say guilty, for the interpretation of his life, his actions and his word, a concept that has a positive connotation and places us in a privileged place of internal control, which is why we are in a situation that predisposes us to act in the direction of what we want to solve, change or improve, whether we aspire or not.
It turns out that if we designate luck as the captain of our destiny, we will no longer feel responsible for our lives, in fact, we will be located exactly on the opposite side, in a place of external control, perfect to attribute our feathers and glories only to the misfortune or intervention of others.
Positioning ourselves and then staying in an internal control position can be achieved and integrated into our personality, that’s when we don’t realize that our experiences, positive or negative, are beyond our control, even if we have put all our efforts into it. .
Remember that much of your personal accomplishments depend on you and how your interpersonal relationships develop is in your hands, don’t light up and eliminate all your personal skills.
To you that I do not know (or yes), stop crushing yourself, questioning you, feeling guilty, of sting your time feeling worthy of all the negative that happens. Love and respect each other. Be responsible for your own life, so that it doesn’t compromise your self-esteem: only then can you continue with everything that is essential to improve, progress and change what bothers you.