An interesting and representative detail that we can observe is the type of greeting that takes place in a meeting between people, depending on the sociocultural context to which they belong.
Beyond the particularities of each region, family or social group, the characteristics of each human being and the bond they establish come into play in an act as symbolic as our form of greeting.
- Both the initial achievement of meeting two people who are not known and the realization between emotionally connected people show a style of relational expression.
We notice the greatest degree of flexibility and the slightest inhibition of physical contact that a woman has between women, compared to the attitude of men in men.
But women – even more women until the 1960s – in the same way that she showed greater physical rapprochement in women, imposed greater physical distance on men.
From the 1960s on the basis of the 1960s there were a number of female-male stereotypes that predominated mainly in sexuality, which led, among other things, to take more initiative in seduction games with men.
For example, historically women not only greeted each other with a kiss, but have also begun to walk the streets holding hands or arm, an attitude so identified with typically feminine behavior that two men would never think of walking hand in hand. or the arm.
Similarly, in gender discrimination, men identify with rationality and emotional distance, while women are associated with sensitivity and emotional expression; however, we are living through a time of revisionism.
All these discriminations constitute distinctions that accentuate or block emotional manifestations in contact with the body, that is, certain rules imposed by the context make possible or not the plasticity of body development, which in a way vetoes or favors contact.
In the formation of the family, parents reproduce the patterns of fear in which they participate and recreate them strongly from the first moments of interaction with their children.
This is how emotional relational codes are formed, which are the responsibility of each particular family, but which reproduce these social stereotypes within them.
It is clear that the healthy maxim of emotional manifestation would be given by the convergence between the multiplicity of forms of expression, and that the relatives themselves could find the most appropriate channel depending on the situation.
However, a style still prevails. It is this style that tends to reproduce because it is opposite or similar to the referencing pattern of contact with the source family.
This means that humans tend to identify themselves by appropriate and reproducing these stereotypes in other relationships (mainly in the upper family).
If we pay attention to it, the type of conformity establishes a model of people’s functioning in terms of emotions and affections: the degree of plasticity, ingenuity or rigidity of bodily expressions in relation to feelings.
There are people who do not kiss, but who greet formally with their hand: if they are men, for example, they show their formality and their social structure, even more so if the welcome is accompanied by a social smile and the respective one?fun!?, in addition to a classic outfit, the one that never goes out of style.
On the extreme level, in this same direction, there are people who greet with a firm handshake and swing their arms militarily, there are those who greet another man with a handshake and a woman with a kiss.
The intensity of the handshake is an interesting detail. There is an average intensity that makes manual compliance irrelevant.
In men, the most formal often shake hands disproportionately and contort the phalanxes of their interlocutors. They are compliments that are remembered for the pain they cause.
Many people express their affections by the force or brutality of their movements, on the contrary, they are rude and are unable to express their emotions, except for rudeness.
A firm welcome, looking into the eyes of the interlocutor, expresses personal security and relationships.
Sometimes people greet with a soft, slippery hand, especially shy. It is these people who have difficulties in social contacts and who do not dare to establish deep relationships and remain in the superficiality of relationships.
This type of compliment reinforces this assumption when the person looks elsewhere and not at the person’s face on the person’s face by shaking his or her hand, or simply from the corner of the lowered eye.
The extreme level of contact phobia is observed in people who perform this type of greeting, who offer and hold only the tip of the fingers, barely look at the face of the interlocutor and, facing the ground, continue their journey to their place.
Some take the caller’s entire hand and even place their left hand to the right of the greeter. This type of greeting is an intermediate route between the handshake and the hug.
They are the most loving people in contact, although in some of these types, their history and personality distortions describe someone somewhat invasive and controlling.
Sometimes we find sweaty hands as a greeting, as an indicator of nervousness and tension during the first encounter.
There are people who make the greeting last a long time and repeatedly move their hand up and down, they are endless greetings, in which it seems that our hand has already stuck to the hand of our interlocutor.
In addition to being a style or the result of anxiety, compliance can reproduce a form of dependent, sticky and demanding social relationship.
All this data offered at the beginning of a meeting show the complementarities of relationships, are games and dynamics that a person could interpret, to subsequently corroborate in the following interactions that occur if the relationship continues.
Clearly, these are generalizations and in relationship games there are no general models.
These statements are hypotheses that illustrate how certain characteristics of interrelated styles should be read, making the most of what sensitive experience can offer us!