Many parents think that their children belong to them, that they are their property, and that they overprotect them to the point of hindering their development so that they can be themselves.
Don’t overprotect your children. Help them grow to face life’s challenges. Let them solve their problems, make their decisions, and learn from their own mistakes and successes.
Parents often want to show their children the best way to go, trying to help them not make too many mistakes.
Mistakes are part of life and experiences will make you independent and self-sufficient people, preventing this is delaying the course of life.
Below is an excerpt from the book “The Prophet”, by the Lebanese poet Khalil Gibran. This chapter is your answer to a woman’s question about her children.
? Your children are not your children
they are sons and daughters of the desire of life for themselves.
They are from you, but not from you
and even though they live with you, they don’t belong to you
You can give them your love, but not your thoughts;
Because they have their own thoughts.
You can protect their bodies, but not their souls;
Because their souls live in tomorrow’s mansion, which you can’t even visit in a dream.
You can strive to be like them, but don’t look
make them like you, because life doesn’t go back and it takes over with the days gone by.
You are the arches of those who throw your children
like living arrows.
The archer points to the target in the path of infinity and
extends you with all its might, so that its arrows are projected quickly and far.
May your bow in the goalkeeper’s hand be your joy
because just like he likes the flying arrow, he also likes
the arc that remains static ?.
Sometimes parents want their children to have everything they didn’t have and not to make the same mistakes as them.
They believe it is better for these helpless beings who are their children, however, they do not take into account that children have the right to live their own lives.
Children have the right to make their own decisions, even in difficult situations; in this way, they learn the consequences of each decision. Of course, parent support is important, as long as you don’t limit your child’s actions.
We have no one and no one can live our experiences. We are children of life and give ourselves with its advantages and difficulties, to find our own identity.
Many times, without even realizing it, we pass on our behaviors, fears, and beliefs to our children. How do we love, relate to the world, and communicate? These are very important aspects to keep in mind.
It’s important to keep an eye on the messages we convey, as many of these messages are handled unconsciously and can determine your behavior, attitudes, and ways of dealing with life.
We are just an instrument by which our children grow up and develop as free, healthy and happy individuals, we must accompany them throughout the development process, but without the intention of fulfilling our dreams and expectations through them.
We can love them unconditionally so that they can explore their essence and choose the best path, without pressure or demands that restrict their freedom and the expression of their needs.
We have the opportunity to observe the flow of life, where everyone can offer the best of himself simply by being loved, respecting his development without fear of experimenting and surrendering to love.