There comes a time when you can do it: learn to be strong, life is a teacher in this regard and teaches you many ways to build a fire retardant attitude, so you tell yourself that you can handle everything, that you have the resources to deal with any kind of adversity?But perhaps you forget the most important thing: time is not just a way to achieve future goals; now is also the time to be happy.
Happiness is nowhere else. He’s in the now, here. The happy person does not postpone his happiness. Life comes now, with the uncertainty of what will come next. These words by the poet Walt Whitman are very precise and inspiring.
- However.
- For those who have just gone through a complicated phase.
- It is not easy to apply this advice and it is not.
- First of all.
- Because when we are going through difficult times.
- It is very difficult for us to look back.
- Presently.
Besides, we travel the world defensively, making sure nothing that happened before happens again. We looked at each other in the rearview mirror of our memory, going over yesterday, trying to get the most out of learning to be prepared for what might happen.
If you’ve experienced a negative, complex, or traumatic episode, don’t become obsessed with strength: think about being flexible, the temptation to get defensive can be very great, protecting you so that nothing can lift the dressing from where the wound was.
“He who defeats others is strong, is he who excels powerful?. – Lao Tse-
Daily balance teaches us, as well as our experiences and relationships, and everything we read and discover at every moment, however, there is one fact in which we must dig deeper: people who have experienced a traumatic event do not always know whether to give themselves new opportunities to achieve happiness. It’s like they’re dating a huge umbrella every day, even if there’s no indication it’s going to rain.
Annteses, a Greek philosopher and founder of the cynical school, said that one of our goals must be to make our souls an impregnable force, but what is the point of becoming a great impassable wall?Light rarely crosses a stone wall, nothing is seen through and, worse, its entrance is impractical for anyone who wants to meet us.
Therefore, those who develop the obsession with having a strong personality always end up living defensively for fear of being wounded again, this is not the best strategy. Because happiness does not harmonize with fear, nor with those who accumulate an excess of defense mechanisms.
Since Martin Seligman laid the foundation for positive psychology in the 1990s, things haven’t changed much. We continue to witness this flourishing of self-help publications to learn how to be happy.
The world is full of faces with yellow smiles and gurus who promise to give us the secrets to realize ourselves as human beings.
Those who have gone through complicated and even traumatic moments do not always find help in these books or manuals. Experts on the subject, such as psychologists Jerome Wakefield of New York University and Allan Horwitz of Rutgers University, have written a book called The Loss of Sadness They talk about some very interesting aspects of that.
Today, there is an over-priority over the obligation to “be happy. “So much so that these specialists claim that we are distorting and setting aside our emotional repertoire, realities such as anguish, fear or sadness.
So those who have gone through adversity accumulate these internal states to a greater extent, so how can you be happy?What can these people do to achieve well-being?
Believe it or not, these people have a very special advantage, who has not experienced any difficulty in life usually have somewhat idealistic fantasies (having a perfect partner, having a great job, making an amazing trip?).
However, those who have learned to be strong value much more basic aspects: calm, balance, the affection of loved ones, being well with oneself?
All these dimensions really build the pillars of true happiness
Life has made you strong and now is the time to be happy, you have gone through different storms, sometimes abrupt changes of course in your life trajectory and, in fact, look at you!You’ve become someone who knows how to be as strong as graphene.
However, you need to add other properties to this material that you are using now, one is flexibility, the other is to be responsive, accept change and work your opening to what surrounds you to continue to find yourself and find what is right. For you.
In the midst of this journey, there is a secret that will allow you to work on your happiness, this is perhaps the most important element. Viktor E. Frankl, in his day, spoke of himself in his famous book Man in Search of Meaning. We talk, of course, about finding a purpose for our lives.
It is to make sense of it, a motivating and intrinsic force that animates our dreams, this internal engine must act every morning as an impulse for us to continue to overcome, setting goals to reach on the horizon and based on what it is. important for us to work on it.